Are there any parents out there with experience with dyslexia

rebecca100

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Since kindergarten the teachers at my son's school have been hinting at dyslexia. This last time I met with my son's new teachers(3rd grade) and they said they believed it was dyslexia and that maybe I shouldn't push him so hard is how I took it. He is extremely intellegent, but basically can't read very well above a first grade level and that is slow at times. He can read above that but it is very difficult for him. He gets frustrated easily. I get frustrated becuase I know he can do better. His teachers have been reluctant though to definately say yes your son has dyslexia, without professional testing i guess. Looking on the internet I have found that he has several things that point to it. I am wondering now what should I do? The school has been working with him and his teachers are very understanding and compassionate, but something is going to have to change. he can't go through life barely reading.
 

1stepcloser

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I am a teacher. I would insist upon testing at the school. If he is dyslexic, he will qualify for special education services. Those services will include specific reading therapies which will help him overcome dylsexia. They were probably hinting at it because they won't really test a child until around 3rd grade because some children are slower to develop their reading skills.

Insist on testing and take it from there. :hugs I will say if he is dyslexic be sure to remain calm and not get frustrated with him. I promise you he is already beating himself up and thinks he is "stupid" compared to other kids. :( (Have watched the pattern year after year...sigh)
 

rebecca100

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He hasn't been tested, but I know they have been trying different things to see if anything helps his reading, like changing background colors. They said that there are many different types of dyslexia and it was very hard to tell what kind he has or to tell for sure if he even has it at all. They always seem to kinda hedge when I ask about having him tested.
 

mrbstephens

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My husband is dyslexic. He actually graduated top of his class, but always struggled with spelling and writing. To this day he has to stop and think before he signs his name. He's told me it's frustrating, but usually he just avoids writing. He uses the computer whenever possible and uses spell check and will also ask me for the spelling. My son is 6 years old and hates writing. I've noticed half the time he'll write his name backwards or a complete mirror image. I homeschool so I see that when we are trying a writing/reading lesson he gets very frustrated. I've read that this can straighten out, but if it does not by the age of 8 then we need to take further steps. I don't think this has anything to do with intelligence or anything like that, it's a small disability that should be worked on. I believe there are tests you can purchase online. You can test him at home and then you can see if there is a need to work on his improving it. He'll probably be thankful in the end.
 

FarmerDenise

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My brother is dyslexic and so is my SO. When they were growing up, it was not well understood and both were made to feel stupid. My brother now loves to read, but he had to find a subject matter he enjoyed and takes a longer time to do so. This did not help him as a child since both his sisters were avid and fast readers. My brother had other special talents though. These were not recognized until adulthood either. I really became aware of his dyslexia, when I went to college to become a teacher. I was then able to explain it to my parents, who then were a little more patient with him, and allowed him to not go to college, studying stuff that required a lot of reading. My brother can look at blueprints and see a 3 dimensional image, something most people cannot do. He is now a wonderfull and successfull contractor.

SO was just thought to be stupid and lazy. His parents allowed him to drop out of high school weeks before graduation, because he wouldn't have been able to graduate with his class anyway. As long as he had a job.
When I met him, he would barely sign his name to something. He never read anything out loud. I explained to him that I understood about dyslexia and that I was good at reading "dyslexic" ;)
He now is willing to write shopping lists and notes and reads out loud all the time. I just make sure I don't rush him. I let him discypher the word for himself.
He asks me to spell very simple words sometimes and I make a point of just spelling it slowly and suscinctly as if he were asking me a difficult word.
I also read to him, when he asks me to. I never assume, though.
SO is a whizz at math. He can change recipes in his head and of course does all these compicated sports numbers in no time at all.
 

ORChick

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My youngest brother is dyslexic. This was hard for him, growing up in a family that all loves books. Luckily, our mother was also left handed, as is my brother, and had had problems with that as a child (though it wasn't called dyslexia then), and understood that he had a problem. I'm not sure what she did, but she found special help for him. She also found, as FarmerDenise said, that finding reading matter of special interest is of prime importance. Everyone else in my family will read anything printed, but my youngest brother didn't get a real start in reading until my mother found books for him on sailing - which was and still is his passion. I can't say for certain, having no experience, but it almost sounds as though your school is hesitant to describe your son as dyslexic, maybe because then they will have to do something about it? You are his mother; push for testing. The earlier started, the earlier it will make a difference in his life.
 

sylvie

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My best friend is severely dyslexic. Her mother, a prominent psychologist, pioneered the program used for dyslexia.

My friend attended college, took exams on computer with extra time allowed for dyslexia, while some exams were administered orally. She retains everything she hears, a coping skill that she developed.
She got her teaching degree, a position teaching special needs children and went on to a masters in administrative education. She is now a principal.

She speaks fluent German and Spanish.

She has dyslexic issues that require problem solving on a daily basis. She is not cured, but was taught tools that enable her to function at a high level.

Understanding her struggles is why I am a little touchy about grammar and spelling police on forums.
 

1stepcloser

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They hedge because it is a long process and they don't want to deal with the drawn out process. Too bad. Get in contact with the principal and tell her everything your son struggles with and tell the principal you want testing.
 

rebecca100

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After reading more about it online, I think my dh is too.He still can barely spell and is left handed. I did a free online test for David and one ot the questions was whether or not anyone in the family had trouble reading or spelling or was left handed which my dh has all of that. He is also really good at figuring things out and can be told how to do something once and can do it.
 

Beekissed

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My son is dyslexic and I fought throughout his school years to get a teacher to admit to it! The very last year, they finally did some testing but said they couldn't call it dyslexia because this is a medical term and their testing was not conclusive for this. They can only test him and say he is "learning disabled".

If they admit he may have dyslexia, the school has to pay for any testing to confirm this so that they can place him for effective learning and the medical testing for dyslexia is expensive.

They can do a CAT scan and monitor areas of brain activity while the subject is reading.

They also have a test that is fairly new that involves a certain kind of testing of vision and hearing, as they now believe dyslexia is a disorder involving the otic/optic nerve center.

You should be pleased that the teachers are at least identifying he has a problem. This will help him in the future when it comes to timed testing like the ACTs or SATs. My son didn't have enough documentation during his school years to indicate he needed extra time for testing and possible audio testing. As a result, he made good scores on these tests but could have made excellent scores, if given an even playing field with other students.

He really can't "do better" in the sense that he is not applying himself. He's doing the best he can, really. He doesn't see what we see. They have assistive aides available for this, if you can get conclusive testing. One is a pen that, when ran over a printed word, says the word. They can also get his text books on audio for him.

You can encourage intensive reading at home, in a very quiet place, and this will help his fluency but probably not his speed. You may not see any improvement on his spelling, as they never seem to misspell the word the same way each time.

My son learned to listen very well and he always made good grades, enough so that the teachers would not admit he had a problem. It took that last testing to make believers out of them! He read at a sophmore in college level, but at the speed of a fourth grader. His spelling was grade school levels also. His IQ? VERY high.

When one teacher at that meeting said he felt Eli could do better if he just took more notes, I had to tell him the truth. Eli could take notes all day....when he got home he could not read what he had written, as the words would be unintelligible to him. They would all be misspelled! The teacher was very apologetic and he was the first one to get Eli's books on audio. They issued him an MP3 player for his books and this made things easier.

I would very much enlist the help of these astute teachers and they may be able to point you in the right direction for conclusive medical testing. With that in his records, there will be all kinds of help for him. They even have scholarships available, "quiet" dorms just for these types of students, extra time for tests and assignments, and extra grants and aids for his education.

I wish Eli had had teachers who would listen and helped when we needed them most. Now he is going to have to go to Vet schooling without any of these programs. Imagine how disadvantaged he will be compared to the other students! You know what, though? I think he will make it! He has always had to learn to compensate for his handicap and this has made him listen better and become more resourceful.

Good luck! :) Sorry for the long post, hope this helps!
 
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