Bettacreek - New home? Plus a pic of some of the ladies here

FarmerDenise

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Don't forget, we are here for you. This group was a great support to me when I needed it. Even if you cannot go online, remember we are here, ready to give you moral support and unsolicited advice.
 

Bettacreek

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Thanks guys. We just weren't made to be. Neither one of us has been happy for awhile now. He didn't want to spend any time with the boys and I, and expected me to be happy sitting at the house all day every day, without much emotional support from him. I have bi-polar and have been battling with seasonal depression for ever since I can remember (yes, I remember having issues when I had purple unicorn sheets and a canopy bed), and he couldn't understand that I need/needed HELP, not to be battled with and bitched at for not keeping the house spotless. The worst part of it was, he'd complain that I didn't keep the house clean, but he never ONCE said anything to his brother. To top it off, he'd insult me when I made his brother's kids put their plates in the sink after dinner. Everything that he complained about, his brother did at least half of it. Then he'd say, "well JD's not home to clean", well, no sh%$^, he's out having FUN. If I had the option of spending money and having fun instead of helping pay bills or cleaning the house, then you know damn well what I'd choose. Bah, anyways, in the end, I'll feel better about myself when I have my own place. He'll end up with the same issues, because he can't be bothered to go to the source of the problem and wants to blame things on the wrong people. I've been in much worse situations and have always been alright in the end. This will just give me more drive to get through nursing school and get all of the things that I want. At least this way, I won't have to worry about pleasing everyone else, I will eventually have my own land, my own house and actually be self-sufficient, like I've always dreamt.

Edited because I used the image tags instead of italics.
 

Occamstazer

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I'm sorry you're going through this :hugs

Even when it's for the best, it sucks. Hang in there, rant if you need to, and eat something with too much chocolate.
 

FarmerDenise

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Occamstazer said:
I'm sorry you're going through this :hugs

Even when it's for the best, it sucks. Hang in there, rant if you need to, and eat something with too much chocolate.
What she said.

It sucks going through it, but things 'll be so much better in a year from now. :hugs
 

Beekissed

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In the end, you might really enjoy going it alone...it definitely has some good points! :hugs Hugs for being brave enough to recognize that you can survive without a man....so many women never take the necessary steps because of that fear. Good luck and keep us posted! :hugs
 

Bettacreek

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We're going to make an attempt at working harder towards our relationship. It's weird really, I'm kind of a hard-ass, as is he. I really thought that I had kept myself fairly safe emotionally. I don't put a lot of trust or hope in anyone anymore, and I thought that I had had emotional blocks up against him. Apparantly, I was wrong. It hurt, a LOT. Much more than I thought it could. Lol. Anyways, he's more of a hard-ass than I am. He's from the military, and he fits that bill to a "t". He doesn't get mad or anything, he keeps his emotions tied up VERY well. Today, we actually both broke down and cried. Crazy stuff. Once you realise just how much you care about each other, it makes you want to try just a little bit harder to work things out. We'll see how it goes. Meanwhile, I'll still be working towards my life goals... nursing school, no debt, self-sufficiency, etc. Hopefully we can work things out, either way, I'll keep moseying along towards what I want. I do greatly appreciate all of the support from you guys. I really needed it. :)

On a much lighter note... I found a huge bag of clothes at my mother's house the other day. I've finally found some time to go through it, and there are a lot of outfits for both of the boys. Most are brand new! Most of them are from a friend who actually gave them to me when I was pregnant with my now two year old! So, I've been going through all of their clothes. I kept three warm jammies and three warm day outfits for each of the boys. Everything else either went into the "gone" bag (Tripp's old stuff) or into a "until next year" bag (Talon's stuff that Tripp can wear next year). Once I get everything washed up and sorted through, I'm going to figure out if they need any other spring/summer outfits, then go on a shopping spree. I know that they'll need new summer jammies, but I want to see just how many sets I'll need for each kiddo. They're $5 per set at the cheapest, so I don't want to buy any that I don't need to. I hope to hit the Goodwill first to try to save money. I definately need new clothes too, but refuse to buy clothes for myself brand new. I can buy an outfit for each of the boys for the price of ONE pair of PANTS for myself! I only have two pairs of pants though, so I definately need to figure something out. I'm going to go through my clothes as well, and get rid of any shirts that I don't wear and many, many pairs of pants that don't fit my fat arse. Hopefully I can have a yardsale or something, then use that money towards our new clothes.
 

FarmerDenise

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I've been going through relationship issues myself. I thought I was going to leave him and actually did for a few days.
We are on a waiting list for couples counseling, I hope it'll help.
If not, my hiking shoes are still in the closet and gas money in the glove compartment of my car. ;)

I rarely buy clothes at regular stores. I love shopping at second hand stores.
Do you know how to sew, because you could buy jammies that are too large, take them in and/or shorten them and then undo it, when they have grown a bit.
I used to do this for a woman I used to babysit for. She didn't know how to sew. It sure helped with keeping her growing boys in clothes.
 

Bettacreek

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Yup. I plan to keep a back-up plan, so that if it falls through, I will still be able to stand strong.
As for clothes, to be 100% honest, I've really never bought clothes for the boys. An old co-worker had given me a good 10 garbage bags full of clothes from her son. He was going on three, so I had clothes all the way up to 2T, before my first son was even born. Add to that all of the clothes that you get for the baby shower, holidays and birthdays, plus Tripp wore a lot of hand-me-downs. So, I've never had to purchase clothes before. I was actually stunned at the cost of clothes, lol. If I had the ambition, I could make about five sets of clothes for the price of one set. I do know how to sew, it's just, well, I don't really have the ambition to do it. As for taking in the jammies, it really sounds like a great idea, I may just try it. My main issue though, is rotating everything to keep with the seasons. My two year old can still fit into a lot of 12mo clothes!
 
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