Cecilia's-life
Almost Self-Reliant
She's paranoid her brother will take it from her, he won't. He's too polite.
Daydreaming while waiting impatiently!
- Thread starter tortoise
- Start date
flowerbug
Sustainability Master
kind of a natural part of pack behavior too where the alpha makes sure to get the first choice type of thing? perhaps can be trained out if caught and corrected when it happens, but once the habit is set it is much harder to change.
Cecilia's-life
Almost Self-Reliant
maybe, Auggie is almost 12. He has no interest in her food. Its not the same food
. He doesn't want her puppy food.- Thread starter
- #2,134
tortoise
Wild Hare
It's reverse! In a group of dogs, its not the case that a dominant dog asserts control over resources. The opposite is true. More risk-averse dogs defer first and the one who eats first or controls resources is just the last one to back away. In natural dog/wolf packs, a pack is a family group and the oldest wolves are by default "dominant" because their offspring defer to them.
However a dog that is usually dominant in a conspecific dyad doesn't always eat first, they will defer to a more motivated (hungry) dog.
Remember that social hierarchies are conflict avoidance strategies
Cecilia's-life
Almost Self-Reliant
I was going to say that but didn't want to start a ruckus
- Thread starter
- #2,136
tortoise
Wild Hare
I havent been sleeping enough. My reading comprehension has suffered and I wasnt able to work. So, naptime, right?.
30 minutes:
Got up 4 times to herd DS6 back to his room
4 phone calls
3 advertisements on streaming music service
1 text message
There is nothing I hate more in life more than interruptions. This situation of being horribly behind on work is because of frequent interruptions. (Every 10 second during the day, or more often). Sleep deprivation is from trying to work at night after my family goes to sleep.
30 minutes:
Got up 4 times to herd DS6 back to his room
4 phone calls
3 advertisements on streaming music service
1 text message
There is nothing I hate more in life more than interruptions. This situation of being horribly behind on work is because of frequent interruptions. (Every 10 second during the day, or more often). Sleep deprivation is from trying to work at night after my family goes to sleep.
flowerbug
Sustainability Master
*wags tail*
flowerbug
Sustainability Master
I havent been sleeping enough. My reading comprehension has suffered and I wasnt able to work. So, naptime, right?.
30 minutes:
Got up 4 times to herd DS6 back to his room
4 phone calls
3 advertisements on streaming music service
1 text message
There is nothing I hate more in life more than interruptions. This situation of being horribly behind on work is because of frequent interruptions. (Every 10 second during the day, or more often). Sleep deprivation is from trying to work at night after my family goes to sleep.
completely understand, thus no children, no pets and the phone is normally off so if someone calls we get back to them when we check for calls. we do not listen to commercial radio (our music is a cd player that holds 300 cds and that is aside from my music collection on my computer) or have the tv on when trying to sleep. we also very much discourage people who have a tendency to pop in. currently we only have one friend like that and that is enough. we're very settled in our ways...
- Thread starter
- #2,139
tortoise
Wild Hare
I went to bed at 6 pm and slept in late. Family has been informed of our "long list" of things to do today. A.k.a. I'm delegating my list. I hope I get time to work today, but I will settle for kids cleaning up after themselves.
flowerbug
Sustainability Master
one thing important to me is that my space be my space. when i moved here to be with Mom the only way that is possible is that she doesn't get a say in how my room looks and she doesn't get into my stuff.
i'm a clutter kind of person, but i don't leave dirty clothes on the floor or wet towels rotting in the closet and i don't leave food on dishes laying around. i just am a horizontal organizer. out of sight is out of mind for me. so if i'm working on a project it is out on the desk or sitting somewhere where i can see it.
Mom will comment about the desk being full of things but while it may be layered and a bit dusty it isn't smelly or disgusting to me.
so perhaps the key for the kids to be clean enough is to say "I don't care what your room looks like as long as it doesn't have: X, Y and Z" and you can close the door the rest of the time.
this way it becomes less of a power struggle and you can let that energy go into more useful pathways? at least that is how i've been trying to train Mom. haha...
and of course, good luck, you'll need it, but with children at least you have a chance of getting some training into them. like, i can do my own laundry, i do cook and clean and know how to take care of things here, completely can do it all on my own and could from a relatively early age. i was almost orphaned in terms of taking care of myself when my parents divorced so i was forced to be on my own a great deal of the time, this was not a harm to me, it made me quite strong and independent. i knew when i needed help and could ask for it too but it also taught me about where my own strengths were (and still are
). i still consider Mom my best-friend in this world and we get along great, but that doesn't mean we aren't quite different people too. so of course we do have our conflicts and arguments, but then we get past them. 
