Do you think....

[FarmerChick]

you create your own happiness and contentment and life in general manipulating the system

or

are you swayed by outside forces that you can not control and feel forced to follow other than lead your own life?


just wondering

 

[valmom]

Maybe it has to do with age, but I used to be dependant on outside forces for my "happiness". Now, the last decade or so- not so much. I have become much more able to let go of people's opinions about what I "should" be or do. I am much happier and content now than I ever have been. Things aren't perfect, but I am content.

 

[lorihadams]

I kind of agree with Valmom. I encountered a lot of opposition to a lot of our "projects" but in general things have worked out for the best and we are happy.

I hate having to follow parts of the system....like health care and gas prices and taxes and such but there's not a lot I can do about it so I just have to make my own happiness elsewhere I guess.

I also used to worry a lot more about other people's opinions of me but I'm starting to get better about not caring so much.

 

[Natalie's Nesters]

I agree with Val, with age comes wisdom. Or I do not give a rats behind! You only get a short time here, make yourself happy!

 

[Marianne]

Both. As a young woman, I married into a certain lifestyle that was 'expected'. As a mother, I was 'expected' to live a certain lifestyle for the kids. I'm 59 now and always thought that I was in the in-between generation, caught between June Cleaver and not allowed to go to Woodstock, ya know? Several times I preached to our daughter and her friends - "Don't you dare throw away what my generation worked so hard for you to have. You can be anything you want to be, do anything you want to do."

Later I realized that I had been in a very bad mood for... hmmmm....5 years. The kids were grown and on their own, so I decided to start taking steps towards a lifestyle that I wanted. We almost ended up in divorce court over moving out to the country (what I wanted but NOT what DH wanted). Much to my surprise, the kids all backed me!

Now DH loves it as much as I do! We've never worked so hard in our lives and never have been happier! Except for yesterday when he sprayed weed killer on my sunchoke patch. I'm still a little annoyed about that.

 

[dragonlaurel]

I think you can create your own happiness of crankiness in life. That doesn't mean that people wont have hard times or get depressed/angry/etc sometimes, but your way of looking at situations will determine what your usual mood is.
Some people lose their house and all their possessions in a disaster- and smile because they got out alive. Other people think about a more normal problem till it's all they can see.
You can be temporarily pushed down in life, but if you stay down or roll with it and spring back up is up to you.

 

[old fashioned]

Like what Dragonlaurel says.......life is 10% circumstances & 90% attitude

 

[Pirtykitty]

How did you convince hubby to move to the country????? I've always wanted to have a place in the country... Hubby is a farmboy.... He say's he'd like to live in the country but then changes his mind...

First husband and his brother had 250 acres and all he did was talk about it but never did anything... wanted me to borrow the money and me pay it back etc.. after 21 years of his foolishness gave him his walking papers... hope our two sons use it better...

Second husband in my knight on a white horse... but would still like to try living in the country...
am I wanting too much... I 'd like more than 3 chickens, and to raise heritage ducks and chickens. have a couple goats etc... bigger garden areas, and an orchard... a couple of ponds , and a well .... He'd like to have a few head of cattle.
I can still remember visiting my grandma and grandpa Lester when they had their farm and loved it..

I'm 54 and he's 62.. He says it would be alot of work..

 

[JRmom]

you create your own happiness and contentment and life in general manipulating the system - this is me

or

are you swayed by outside forces that you can not control and feel forced to follow other than lead your own life? - this is my husband

This causes a lot of exasperation with each other... my glass is always half full, his is always half empty... sometimes it's rough being so far apart on this.

 

[me&thegals]

you create your own happiness and contentment and life in general manipulating the system - this is me

or

are you swayed by outside forces that you can not control and feel forced to follow other than lead your own life? - this is my husband

This causes a lot of exasperation with each other... my glass is always half full, his is always half empty... sometimes it's rough being so far apart on this.

Ditto, although I find myself becoming more negative over time and need to fight that, hard! I usually (used to) see how incredibly blessed we are. Lately I've been seeing way too much work, not enough sleep or exercise and not enough time with friends. I think it may be "all work and no play..." and need to find better balance.