I need words of wisdom from you folks

[inchworm]

I suspect if you have a big "clean-up", it will be a mess again before you know it. Running out of heat, dog feces, and lice indicates to me that the kids are in jeopardy. I hate getting involved with the government, but I would call Child Services. You may need legal protection in case your sister demands her kids back. File to be their foster parent so you have legal oversight and financial reimbursement. Your relationship with your sister may suffer, but the kids health and well being comes first.

Good luck!

Inchworm

 

[Dace]

Shareneh....I also would suspect some sort of mental illness. Just because your sister functions well in other areas of her life does not mean she doesn't have a mental illness.

Bless you for saving the girls from a bad situation! They are lucky to have you! Big hugs...

 

[sylvie]

I had a relative like that. She was a secret drinker.
Brought the dogs in, the whole bit.
It began when her DH died and she became progressively overwhelmed.

Her kids were too embarrassed to have friends over because of the mess. If one really wanted a friend to pick them up they tried to clean the entire house. The younger kids were bed wetters and the house smelled of old urine so it was futile.

She worked and was very respected and well liked, seemed happy, dressed in very good taste. She just shut down at home.
Mental illness or overwhelmed or alcohol, we will never know because she passed away. So sad.

 

[shareneh]

Yeah Sylvie that sounds like my sis. Her older boy and the 12 year old girl are bed wetters and she has never bothered to wash a blanket or sheet and doesn't try to do anything to help it for longer than a couple of days.

Her daughter that is staying with me now is a bed wetter. She knows she will wet after four hours and asks to be waken up in the middle of the night. We have gotten to where the last two nights she doesn't need to be awaken. She pees about four or five times the hour before she goes to bed and hasn't wet herself since she got here. She is very proud of herself. I'm not trying to make a big deal of it.

My sister is really overweight. I am also worried that she will pass. She smokes a lot and is about 150 lbs overweight. She is tired all the time and I finally got her to see a doctor. She has diabetes now.

I called the psychiatrist at 8am this morning so I will get back to you all on when her appointment is.

 

[MorelCabin]

That litle girl is going to have such a good self esteem boost from being relieved of the bedwetting...God Bless your heart. He will provide Shereneh, He has blessed those kids with you, AND He has blessed you with THEM! This will be good for your spirit as well as thiers

 

[FarmerChick]

Share you are so great!
Seriously, you are stepping up and helping your sister and that is the coolest and most noble thing.....I am smiling for you!

Those kids sound great! They just need a little stability and you are providing it and they are flourishing with you! WONFERFUL

I know I would love to have a sister like you.

I know it will all work out well for you.....baby steps to get things taken care of.....things will work out cause you are helping!!!!

 

[PamsPride]

It is always harder when it is family!! I speak from experience!!! I had my sisiter's three kids for two years (plus my own 5 kiddos).
I would avoid children services at all costs!!! Their desire is to just reunite the family...see that she gets her heat on, cleans the house, and then give the kids back. They try to do it as quickly as possible and do not care if they maintain the lifestyle. If you can get your sisiter to sign a paper from a lawyer giving you custody that is the best route to go.
Please don't think about the bills or increase in monthly expenses God WILL provide everything you need for the kids!! Somebody HAS to step up to the plate and keep the kids out of this lifestyle or they will be the same way as their mom!
I am not completely opposed to reunification I am just opposed to letting the situation continue without change!!

 

[hoosier]

I can't add anything to what has been posted. I just wanted to let you know that I hope everything works out for you and your family.

 

[shareneh]

Ok

I know you guys are praying and when we band together with God great things happen. Since I have sent this out at 3am these things have happened.

1. I contacted out local mental health, they worked on getting my sister evaluated and will see her on Feb. 9. They are concerned and really think they can help her.

2. I talked with my sis and she is happy to know that there is help for her and that it isn't all her fault.

3. Got to play with a cute 2 year old girl. That was fun.

4. My sister contacted the furnace man and he came out and started her furnace.

5. I went to her house about 15 minutes ago and her downstairs is clean and poop free. She also kenneled her small dog so it doesn't tear things up.

6. My sister came over and started to cry with joy and pain. She said she is happy and sad, happy she has heat again--it's -35 right now, and sad because she put her girls in this position.

You guys are such a help to me.

As far as getting social services involved, I don't like to do that. I work for law enforcement and know that they don't follow up around here. For now I have my photos and my husband and son's witness to the condition the house was in. Just in case she decides to fight me. She hasn't and she is actually greatful to me and my husband for doing this for her girls. She didn't know what she was going to do and didn't want to tell us what was happening.

My mom is breaking down and feeling bad for my sister. I feel bad for them too but now that I have talked to you guys and the doctors office I feel like this is the right thing to do.

Thank you guys, you have made my day and job here easier.

I will keep you posted.

 

[MorelCabin]

Wonderful! Things will work out for you all, will keep you all in my prayers over the next few days. Keep us posted! So happy things are looking up...I think your sister was crying for help but didn't know how to ask.