low intervention births ( carryover from BYC)

[Occamstazer]

How much resistance did you guys meet from, um...mothers-in-law, doctors, and so forth?
I forsee that causing me serious problems in the future. I can bully my own family into leaving me alone to do things my way, but she's another boat entirely

Let me start by saying my Mother in law hates me anyway for taking her boy child.

She was HORRIFIED I was planning a home birth, she kept telling me horrible stories and tried right up until the day before my daughter was born to change my mind.

I didn't have a regular doctor, I did go see one when I was pregnant for something else - and when told about my planned home birth he asked "And your husband is going to allow this?" I actually LAUGHED at him!

Allow?
Bwahahahah!

 

[SerenityPrayer]

I have had two wonderful homebirth experiences with babies we were never supposed to be able to conceive. I had so many lousy experiences with insensitive doctors throughout our infertility testing that I was not about to give birth in a hospital unless there was a major medical problem (we lived 5 minutes away from a hospital with one of the best NICU's in our state).

Our first was a 42 hour labor (you know an OB would never have allowed me to labor that long without cutting me!) and my midwife and her assistant were there for over 38 hours checking me, encouraging me, and making sure I was ok. (Our little guy had his hand up by his face, so his elbow kept him from descending in a proper position. I spent a lot of time in my birthing pool or on the bed with my rear end in the air to get him to shift into a different position). It was not a "fun" labor, but I was confident that we were ok and that we could do it...and we did! I was so ready to get him out that it only took three pushes for him to be born.

Our second was much shorter (only 17 hours) and I loved every minute of it! She was born in the birthing pool and it was incredibly calm and peaceful.

I needed no stitches for either birth and the babies nursed immediately.

I loved being at home because I could do whatever I wanted to do, whatever felt right for my body and I didn't need a doctor's "permission" to follow my instincts.

Birth is a natural process; it is not an illness or "condition". A woman's body was designed to give birth and most doctors seem to do everything they can to inhibit the natural process. If I had found a doctor I had trusted and who realized that I knew my body better than he/she did, perhaps I would have had a hospital birth, but every doctor with whom I spoke gave the impression that they knew best and that their procedures must be followed. That just rubbed me the wrong way and I guess I rebelled. I'm so glad I did!

My midwife spent a lot of time with me, listening to any concerns, and answering my questions. I hope to have another opportunity in the near future to do it again!

 

[eggs4sale]

Anyway I stand up like they say...and hold onto my dh's waist. Well let's just say his pants were no longer up around his waist when I was done b/c the pain was so bad. )

 

[Mackay]

I trained and practiced as a lay midwife many years ago. There is a lot to know and I suggest you read all that you can.

Its pretty important to guide your guy along with you lest you have him keeling over or running out the door when the time comes.

Most important I think is finding a midwife, lay or certified, that is committed to a safe home birth. Most certified midwives will not do home births but some do and it may depend on the state you live in. They are controlled by state regulations where mostly lay midwives are controlled by their passion and instincts only. Only a few states have state regulations for lay midwives.

It is critical that you have a midwife that can bring a degree of assessment skills to the plate. You won't really know if you have a good one unless you read and educate yourself or you could go by solid recommendations. She should take time with you and work at building confidence and knowlege through every phase of pregnancy and labor and birth.

I have found that some certified nurse midwives are like mini doctors and not really all that into natural birth. So watch out for that. Certainly they are not all that way.

If for some reason you decide that you are going to have your baby in the hospital after all for some reason be sure you have a dula or a husband or friend who can speak up for your wishes. Its hard to stand up for yourself when you are so vulnerable. There may be things you want or don't want and you will need a spokes- person.

I strongly recommed that you have a back up physican and most good lay midwives can recommend one. Have a couple of visits with him. Then if things go wrong you will have someone on the hospital side that you know.

Because I have a small pelvic outlet I ended up having c-sections x2. It was either that or fracture my pelvis which no one does these days, thank god. Having a c-section is not the end of the world it is just the beinging of a new one and I am thankful that I had skilled medical help when I needed it. My backup physician believed in and supported the lay midwife community and he also believed in V-backs... that is a vaginal birth after c-section which was a goal on my second birth that I never realized.

The most important thing is to roll with the punches, try to make sound decisions based on keeping the goal in mind, a healthy baby and a capable mom. A home birth should never be THE GOAL.

 

[big brown horse]

What she says. Hey Mackay, what is the difference b/t a certified and lay midwife? Mine was "certified" but she was really into the natural births. She used evening primrose oil etc., no heart monitors etc. She used this silly looking device to hear the baby's heart beat that wasn't plugged in at all. I forgot what it was called. I'll look it up and edit this post. ETA: it was called a pinard stethoscope. It would only hear the baby's heart beat, not the mom's.

Oh yeah SerenityPrayer, I forgot about that little gory bit of info, no episiotomy was needed (for me) b/c of the birthing pool. That information alone was enough to keep me from having a hospital birth! Can we say "OOOOUUUUUCCCCHHHHH"!!! (Then come stitches after the birth, again, OUCH!)

 

[big brown horse]

Here is a bit of info on episiotomys vs. tearing naturally and avoiding tearing as much as possible etc. (It hurts just thinking about it! You can tell I'm a sissy!)

http://parenting.ivillage.com/pregnancy/plabor/0,,hmjk,00.html

 

[Occamstazer]

See, now I'm sitting about three inches higher in my chair because I can't unsqueeze my legs after reading that.

 

[big brown horse]

I know right!!!! YOUCH!

That is why I say water births are the best! Don't underestimate the power of evening primrose oil...'nuff said.

 

[Wildsky]

Oh yeah SerenityPrayer, I forgot about that little gory bit of info, no episiotomy was needed (for me) b/c of the birthing pool. That information alone was enough to keep me from having a hospital birth! Can we say "OOOOUUUUUCCCCHHHHH"!!! (Then come stitches after the birth, again, OUCH!)

Dang I should have rented a pool or something............. even at home I tore, my dern babies are just too big

I did try hop in the shower, and had the hot water on my back (where alot of my pain was) but the hard shower stall was just uncomfortable and I wanted my bed! I felt so cozy and safe being in my own bed with my own pillow and comforter.

 

[FarmerDenise]

As I said earlier, I had my DD in an Alternate Birthing Center. this was located in a hospital, so all the hospital emergency stuff was there.
The birthing room was decorated with pinkish flowered wall paper, everything was made to look more like a hotel room than a hospital. The hospital bed was queen sized so the husband (or whoever) could sleep in the bed too. They had nice pictures on the wall, although I don't remember them. Most of the nurses were really nice and respected my desire to have a natural birth. I did have the option to take meds at any time I chose. One nurse was really helpful, getting me through some of the contractions. I can still remember looking into her blue eyes and her helping me breathe.
My DD was turned facing the wrong way and needed to turn around. I had a lot of back pain. They had me try different positions, but I couldn't stand any of them for long. I hyper ventilated at one point, and that felt quite good, but they made me stop that
She did get herself turned the right way around and like all babies, she did come out.
I was glad I was wide awake and then was able to tell the next batch of nurses, what I did not want done to my baby!!! I had to argue with them several times. I wanted my 2 hours bonding time and to be left in peace.

I was in labor for 14 hours. I felt well prepared. I had read a lot. I had been labor coach to 2 friends and taken the birthing classes with my husband. He was also very attentive.

My family was ok with the natural childbirth thing, but the inlaws thought it was primitive to say the least. Thank goodness they lived on the east coast and we lived on the west coast. MIL had some strange ideas. DH just stopped giving her too many details after a while.

I have since attended other births. Each one was different. Of all the ones I had any part in, mine was the easiest. I could easily have had a home delivery. And if I had another child, I would have insisted on it.