Two Legged Corn Thieves

[dragonlaurel]

free, we know who the guy was picking the corn. Ernie was adamant that I not confront the guy, because he's crazy. He's a huge weirdo.

Some examples of his behavior.

Back in 2001, we had just moved back from TN and were working on clearing the property here to move our trailer on. We had just planted some nice trees (tulip poplars and pin oaks) in a newly cleared area.

Later in the day we hear someone brush hogging. I told Ernie, sounds like it's down the road (we lived up by FIL at the time). We came down to find that our entire field had been brush hogged, and our trees we had just planted were, too.

Ernie and his dad followed the trail of grass and mud clumps (it was an extremely muddy year!) to the guys house (lives diagonally from us to the right). Ernie knocks on the door and says, I want to talk to the owner of that machine right there and he points to the brush hog. The neighbor says, "Oh that doesn't run!" Ernie replied, I just followed your mud clumps here from my place.

So the guy spouts back, "Well, Ernie Turner gave me persmission to brush hog there!"
Ernie yells at the guy, "I am Ernie Turner!" He then told him if he caught him trespassing up here again, he'd shoot a hole in the block and then the machine really WOULDN'T run! (he threatened the MACHINE not the man!)

Last year this same guy stopped us at the bottom of our driveway and gave us a detailed description of how Ernie became owner of the property, plus details about the previous owner and the property next to us and what's buried on it. He had information going back 20 years, and pulled it all off the top of his head! He's only lived here since 2000! Yet, he has made a point of studying and learning everything about all the properties and owners of the properties in our area.

Scary stuff IMO!

Tell him it was some guy in a pickup truck and that you wish you could have had a better look at him. Then the advice about planting the feed corn there will make sense.

Now if he wants to be a little nasty- he could run a hot wire between the 1st and 2nd row of corn. It wont be very visible at night and might not show from the street. The guy might take some, but if he gets greedy , he'll get zapped. Sorry if this isn't very P.C. but sounds like he deserves it.

 

[big brown horse]

I think you came off as very P.C. You steal, you get shocked...nuf said.

 

[SKR8PN]

I think you came off as very P.C. You steal, you get shocked...nuf said.

I am NOT very PC.
In my world it would be "If you steal, you get shot".

Did I mention that I hate thieves?

 

[Quail_Antwerp]

Do you think it makes a difference that the guy stealing the corn is the one leasing the ground to the farmer.....I'm thinking he thinks he's entitled to the corn.

dragonlaurel, we don't really worry about anyone being PC here.

 

[dragonlaurel]

Well a couple people were saying that it was still a drop in the bucket of what those fields would end up producing. Or not wanting to upset a likely candidate for a rubber room or jail cell someday.
I was in a bad mood about other stuff already and knew i could over react pretty easily. So I pulled the punch a little.
I still really enjoyed the mental picture of it. In my mental image the guy also thought the corn looked like a "thirsty bush" and really got a good charge. it