Frustratedearthmother's Journaling Journey

[frustratedearthmother]

Wow, I don't know how some of you do it all.

Cuz there's just no other choice...

I just admire your positivity FEM. Not only do it all, but do it all while not complaining (much, I mean you are human!)

LOL - convince my husband of that!! He's so patient with me!

Gotta go feed and milk before dark and then work on the bed. The frame that I THOUGHT I had - is a king frame... grrrrr. Mattress and box spring sitting on the floor in front of the headboard right now. Just a little bit disappointing because I really wanted to get that taken care of today. But, at least they can sleep on a real mattress instead of a couch like they've been doing the last few days. It' hard on 'em...

 

[milkmansdaughter]

Your parents sure raised a fabulous daughter! I'm sure they'll appreciate not only a real bed but also having a place to go. And windows on both sides of the room might be really nice for them. They'll be able to look out and see a lot without having to watch their step.
Now if only all the rest of Houston had someone like you ...

 

[baymule]

It looks like my sister's house might be totaled. The attached garage isn't attached anymore. It slid off the slab foundation. The house has 9' ceilings and took 8' of water. Brick was washed off the outside walls from the force of the water. And more destruction, this was just a quick walk through by her son and grand son. They did have flood insurance. She is already looking for another house.

 

[frustratedearthmother]

Your parents sure raised a fabulous daughter!

Awwwww...shucks. But - it's just the right thing to do.

It looks like my sister's house might be totaled.

I feel so bad for your sis. Hopefully she will find something that will suit her needs quickly. High/dry houses just went way up in value!

 

[milkmansdaughter]

So sorry to hear this @baymule (and I imagine the same for your parents' home @frustratedearthmother I'm really glad she had insurance, but even with insurance, I can only imagine the personal items lost that can't be replaced...photo albums and things saved from when the kids were little, home made things, and personal records. I'm sitting here high and dry and am looking around at just my living room (8'ceiling) and can see my Bible, my work from a 4 year degree (was looking something up), my grandfather's flag and dog tags (I get my dad's flag too after my mom dies) and one from my husband from a day they were shot down, pictures on the wall, my son's guitar that he got from a family friend who has passed away, a handmade quilt my aunt made for me for my 18th birthday... And that's only in my living room. The furniture is nothing special. And we've moved enough to be able to walk away from any house, but some things just can't be replaced no matter how much money they (might eventually) get.
@baymule am I remembering correctly that they also had a business?

 

[baymule]

@baymule am I remembering correctly that they also had a business?

Yep, same property. The ware house flooded and took one box truck out in the woods and wrapped it around a tree. They have a auto detail business, they sell supplied to car dealerships for make ready, cleaning the cars, car washes, etc. They lost product, but can recover from that. They got their other work trucks out.

 

[frustratedearthmother]

Oh wow Bay - that is awful. I really hope they can put their life back together!

I've got mom and dad here. They are so frail. Mom runs herself ragged taking care of dad. I'm going to have a little talk with him! He has her waiting on him hand and foot....that is NOT going to cut it. Granted, he has trouble getting up and down but a month ago when I was down for his b'day he was getting up and down by himself. Now he needs to be pulled up.

I'm hoping he can get back on a regular schedule and regain some of his strength. She isn't strong enough to get him up if he falls. I'll be spending the next few weeks hoping and praying that we can get him on a better path. If not, I can't see them ever going back to their home alone. I'm all for them staying home - with help. Mom has always refused help - but she told me today that she knows she needs it now.

I'm going to sleep downstairs on the sofa tonight in case they need something. Being upstairs with our door closed we wouldn't be able to hear them.

Their house is just awful... they were pulling up carpet when I was there. It's been sitting in there wet and nasty for four or so days. The stench.... argh! I grabbed some personal things like pics of my sister who passed and their 50th anniversary plate and a couple of their favorite collectibles. I put them in their room and they were just thrilled to have a little part of home here. And they were really glad to be on a bed instead of a couch!!

 

[baymule]

I am so glad your parents are with you. You are starting a journey, one that I and many others have been down. I don't need to tell you how much work this will be. It would be nice to get their house fixed so they could go home, and I hope they can. This has been and will be a huge stress on them, I hope your father can improve. You might want to check on home health care for them. My grandmother and my parents used it and it was a real help.

My sister has decided to fix their house. She already has workmen there. She looked around and house prices are screaming high and the sky is the limit. So for now, it just makes financial sense to fix it.

 

[milkmansdaughter]

I got one of the portable, battery operated doorbells. I gave mom the door bell buzzer button ( the art that would be by your outside door for visitors to push). I kept the other part. If mom needed me, and I was upstairs or in the basement or outside, all she had to do was push the button. Test to see how far you can go, but it helped me with several elderly clients too. I hope it works for you. They're quite cheap (under $10)

 

[Mini Horses]

Glad you were able to get them and help with their care. They are your parents & I understand, could/would do same.
But look hard at what is to come & how to handle it. Assisted living comes to mind. A Place for Mom is a great resource for many topics & locations that provide such units for seniors. Also info on any number of "how to" for funding in sense of application, requirements, etc.

With age, when we get frail it keeps going downhill. In home help is needed and expensive, not always reliable. It is time to check into home assistance furniture for them. Lounge chairs with motors that raise the seat to help them stand...walkers, etc. Even a motorized bed (hospital bed?) which can be a huge help to raise/lower for them to get in out, etc. If doctor recommended then Medicare will pay for many of these type items. You know I did this for 5 years...my mom...and they were very long years! Two?? Well, just research now. Hey, your nurse can sure help you with items like this that are out there.......your DH, I mean. Exercise therapy, etc. won't hurt.

If they live there you will be totally changing your life and everything about it. Just saying Look into options that are out there to help them live "independently".

Whenever my kids ask me why I still DO the things I do I tell them for physical fitness! They just don't understand yet.