baymule
Sustainability Master
I guess this is how my mind works. Extra grease guns? Haha grease up your creaky joints! I wish it was that simple for my crappy knees.
Organizing and decluttering the homestead
- Thread starter Beekissed
- Start date
- Thread starter
- #82
Beekissed
Mountain Sage
That's definitely it and she's getting worse in her memory. She's starting to buy things and brands we've never bought, but covers her embarrassment over it all by getting pert. When it comes my time...and that time is already here...I won't be a bit embarrassed. What else can a person do when they are losing their memory...mistakes are going to be made. Period. Other folks can just get over it.
Right now she's taking pain meds for a problem and she doesn't do well with narcotics at all, being unable to get them out of her body well, so they build up and then she's confused, lethargic, and just needs to hydrate and sleep it off. All of this makes her doubly forgetful, so I'm finding various things in very odd places as she puts away dishes and such.
Very hard to stay organized with that going on, but I'm going to keep trying. Spent all night up to 3 am organizing that pantry, along she comes this morning and puts a stock pot out there on the shelf that belongs under the sink. I promptly removed it and put it where it goes. Will just have to keep up on that more so things don't go all sixes and sevens again.
tortoise
Wild Hare
Don't be afraid to label everything. It helps when living with other people of any age.
- Thread starter
- #84
Beekissed
Mountain Sage
I've been doing that like crazy and that helps me tell her where to put things or find things, but she forgets to read the tub labels. I'm going to keep at it, though, as it will help me as time goes along. I get those cheap wash tubs from DG that are sturdy, large enough to hold a lot and can be written upon with permanent markers and they have been a huge blessing.
I've also initiated a large desk calendar on the wall, right where we both have to see it several times a day, with appointments marked on it, different events marked down and I've encouraged her to mark her own social plans on it as well so I know at any given time where she is supposed to be. It's a work in progress, as she forgets to mark things down....but it helps her keep track of the days, as we cross off each day as it's done.
I keep a list on the fridge of chores we need to complete and that keeps me straight more than it does her, as she forgets to look at the list. Things are going to get tougher from here on in, but that's why I'm here and that's my job...so far that job has been incredibly easy. Time to pull on the work boots and get set for the uphill part of the journey.
baymule
Sustainability Master
Bee, it sounds like your Mom is going down that road that none of us want to go down. We certainly don't want to see our parents start that slide downward. It goes a little at a time, but it is steady and it goes until it is gone. Big hugs to you. I know yours is a journey of love.
- Thread starter
- #86
Beekissed
Mountain Sage
It is! I was blessed with an exceptional mom, so anything I can do to keep her in her home and doing her normal life for as long as possible, I will do. I'm incredibly blessed to be able to do this for her, as she has helped me through many a difficult time in my own life.
milkmansdaughter
Super Self-Sufficient
Been there, done that!
@Beekissed if I didn't like you for ANY other reason (not the case!), I'd really like you just based on your love and respect and care for your mom. The time and patience and love required can be overwhelming at times, but being willing to take that journey at her side is worth it.
@Beekissed if I didn't like you for ANY other reason (not the case!), I'd really like you just based on your love and respect and care for your mom. The time and patience and love required can be overwhelming at times, but being willing to take that journey at her side is worth it.
- Thread starter
- #88
Beekissed
Mountain Sage
God made it easy for me! She's always been my best friend, through thick and thin, and I'd never even contemplate leaving her when she needs me the most. She makes it easy to love her, so I'm always walking around feeling blessed at having such an easy job in this life.
It would have been harder to care for Dad in the same situation, as we never had a good relationship, but I still see to his care in the nursing facility....it's the only time I have ever been able to love and nurture him in this life, so I take advantage of that too!
He never did like me, so being able to care for his needs and tend to his physical being is a gift as well.
Britesea
Sustainability Master
You may actually find as your father gets worse that your relationship changes for the better. My mom was abusive and resentful of me (I think it started when, as a new-born, I stole center stage from her... so sad). But as her condition progressed, she forgot who I was... decided I was her older sister, and then her mother. For the first and only time in her life she treated me with friendship and love. I still treasure those last months.
- Thread starter
- #90
Beekissed
Mountain Sage
Oh, Dad knows exactly who I am, though he can no longer speak much or respond to anything with a comprehensive answer. He's in stage 4 dementia but he still "knows" Mom and he still knows me..and knows he doesn't like me still.
Gets that hard look around his eyes and mouth when he sees me... But, I still get to care for him physically and also see that his care is done well by the nursing facility, so it matters not to me if Dad likes me or not, I still love him and God has given me ways to show it, but has taken away Dad's ability to rebuff my efforts. It all works.
