FarmerChick
Super Self-Sufficient
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it is cool...all is over that I can see so best move forward is the best way to go..LOLreinbeau said:
Quail_Antwerp: Words from the Barnyard...
- Thread starter Quail_Antwerp
- Start date
2dream
Flibbertigibbet
Keep typing QA - we are reading and understanding.
You and Ernie are wonderful hardworking people. Don't let the turkeys get you down.
You and Ernie are wonderful hardworking people. Don't let the turkeys get you down.
- Thread starter
- #2,893
Quail_Antwerp
Cold is on the Right, Hot is on The Left
So there was a purpose, a reasoning, and a point-or rather a lesson- that I had started out to share. I maybe should have said, "Please give me time, a few days, etc" to get it all out there.
Believe me when I tell you I do not want to be sharing any of this with ya'll, it makes me feel naked and exposed-ok I will ask that someone PLEASE toss me a towel to cover up with-Someone more powerful than me has told me to. I've tried to ignore it, or rather Him, but the more you ignore, the harder the push, and the stronger I feel compelled....
I will reiterate, I'm not asking for pity, or sympathy, this is just a raw, factual black and white of my life, how it was to how it is now, because someone somewhere for some reason is supposed to be getting a lesson out of it. I don't know who it is, it may very well that God's needing ME to get the lesson, who knows, but that's the purpose.
I can't promise that this won't at some point be a rambling going on of things, but I can promise you there's no way I can fit it all into one post, one day, or maybe even the remainder of this week..And, I'm probably going to be jumping between then and now, a life comparison of me then and now.....course by now, if you're not already nodding off and snoozing from boredom, the audience may be gone before I finish. In that case, I'm going to assume the lesson is for me. (Yes, I know what they say about assuming, I'm willing to take the risk!)
There's several voices going on in my head right now, not multiple personalities, just voices of past, present, future....Oh wait, that's Bon Jovi.........da da daaaa da da da da...da da daa da da da.....da da da da da da daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! da da DA!!
....Um...yea ok so where we were????
Hey, have I told ya'll that we've been 8 years without water?? I think I have I'm just not sure where....or I think in the thread I was thinking of it had only been 7 years and I've been here a year.....
So yea, 8 years ago....there's snappy little me, driving my fancy smancy little car...
WAIT! I interrupt myself to give ya'll an update on Ernie's medical stuffus....We finally got, well sorta got, results of his catscan from back in November....only a month and a half later.....
Anyway, first this coming Monday he sees his primary physician to be tested for....DIABETES!! and arthritis. YAY. (That's dripping with sarcasm. not excited at all!)
January 5, 6, and 7, he gets to go for nerve blocks in his back!! This is with the back surgeon, from the back surgeon what ever, because the surgery has NOT done....let me repeat that...the SURGERY HAS NOT DONE what they've expected it to do, and instead of being able to GRADUALLY return to normal activities and removing of the back brace, etc etc etc....they told him to NOT do anything...they reiterated, ok well, actually the nurse got the machine and my outgoing message says, "We're a full time farm and we cannot come to the phone right now...." Ernie was in what we call "the office" so he couldn't get to the phone, and he doesn't move fast right now. So, the nurse is on the machine before he got there, but he answered anyway. SHE LECTURES HIM and says, "You're not supposed to be doing any of that farm work!" He says to her, "I was in the bathroom!"
So again, Dr's orders are no lifting, bending, twisting, NO DRIVING, No Sex (this un's killin me!), NO FARM WORK. And he cannot take off the back brace. Ernie tried to explain the symptoms he is having now, and how his back is swelled, etc and how it rubs on the brace and causes more pain...they don't care, keep it on. No oral pain meds are allowed until after they see how or if the nerve blocks help. Yikes. Follow up is I think January 22 on the nerve blocks.
So anyway...whew I'm already exhausted and haven't said half of what I want to... :/
I need to go further than 8 years ago.....
11 years ago...wait too far....ummm no it's not....11 years ago we got married, moved to Tennessee and said goodbye to the family who we felt had tortured us beyond measure and said HELLO! to what we thought was the good life! (Young and stupid, young and stupid! that's all I'm saying!)
Ernie got a great paying job working for a construction company almost immediately. LUCRATIVE money....just flowing like honey from the company, to the bank, through our fingers. We were living high on life and high on the hog (no drugs included). Wednesdays were payday. Wednesdays we paid the bills we needed to pay out of that check, went out to eat, went shopping, went to movies...splurged splurged splurged....or better....wasted wasted wasted.....yea, that's what we did LOL
We had a house payment, a car payment, insurance, baby on the way....
Oh yea, baby on the way! That was our DD! We were so excited to become parents! One of the first things we had done with E's first pay from the company was to go put in a baby layaway! We felt that it was most important (niave dumb kids we were!) to have the things we'd need to bring her home first! (We thought of needing a bed/bassinet 1 month before she was due! LOL Dumb Niave, kids we were!) E wasn't into "baby shopping" so I was doing the choosing. I picked an adorable rear facing carseat, a diaper bag, diapers, wipes, coming home outfit, and a blanket. Ernie chose spoons.
SPOONS?! Yea, you read right SPOONS! I asked what do we need spoons for? he said to feed the baby!!
Pick your battles, that's what my mom said, and he was baby shopping....So I totally agreed, yes we definitely need spoons! (I told him later how silly it was, but after she was born!)
So anyway, we spent roughly $100 a week on things we wanted....not needed, just wanted. Our grocery bill was about the same each week, so $200 (sometimes less, sometimes more) a pay spent in a week....that's $10,400 a year that I can't tell you what we spent it on now...I can tell you probably only 1/4 of that was spent on actual FOOD.
Wow. I do those numbers and I look back and think what a waste. What we wasted in one year is more than we paid for our home we live in now. WOW.
See, the lesson might be for me after all!
Ok, now I'm really exhausted, definitely have more to tell, type, etc...but I need to think about where this is supposed to be going, etc. etc...
so...
to be continued.................
Believe me when I tell you I do not want to be sharing any of this with ya'll, it makes me feel naked and exposed-ok I will ask that someone PLEASE toss me a towel to cover up with-Someone more powerful than me has told me to. I've tried to ignore it, or rather Him, but the more you ignore, the harder the push, and the stronger I feel compelled....
I will reiterate, I'm not asking for pity, or sympathy, this is just a raw, factual black and white of my life, how it was to how it is now, because someone somewhere for some reason is supposed to be getting a lesson out of it. I don't know who it is, it may very well that God's needing ME to get the lesson, who knows, but that's the purpose.
I can't promise that this won't at some point be a rambling going on of things, but I can promise you there's no way I can fit it all into one post, one day, or maybe even the remainder of this week..And, I'm probably going to be jumping between then and now, a life comparison of me then and now.....course by now, if you're not already nodding off and snoozing from boredom, the audience may be gone before I finish. In that case, I'm going to assume the lesson is for me. (Yes, I know what they say about assuming, I'm willing to take the risk!)
There's several voices going on in my head right now, not multiple personalities, just voices of past, present, future....Oh wait, that's Bon Jovi.........da da daaaa da da da da...da da daa da da da.....da da da da da da daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! da da DA!!
....Um...yea ok so where we were????
Hey, have I told ya'll that we've been 8 years without water?? I think I have I'm just not sure where....or I think in the thread I was thinking of it had only been 7 years and I've been here a year.....
So yea, 8 years ago....there's snappy little me, driving my fancy smancy little car...
WAIT! I interrupt myself to give ya'll an update on Ernie's medical stuffus....We finally got, well sorta got, results of his catscan from back in November....only a month and a half later.....
Anyway, first this coming Monday he sees his primary physician to be tested for....DIABETES!! and arthritis. YAY. (That's dripping with sarcasm. not excited at all!) January 5, 6, and 7, he gets to go for nerve blocks in his back!! This is with the back surgeon, from the back surgeon what ever, because the surgery has NOT done....let me repeat that...the SURGERY HAS NOT DONE what they've expected it to do, and instead of being able to GRADUALLY return to normal activities and removing of the back brace, etc etc etc....they told him to NOT do anything...they reiterated, ok well, actually the nurse got the machine and my outgoing message says, "We're a full time farm and we cannot come to the phone right now...." Ernie was in what we call "the office" so he couldn't get to the phone, and he doesn't move fast right now. So, the nurse is on the machine before he got there, but he answered anyway. SHE LECTURES HIM and says, "You're not supposed to be doing any of that farm work!" He says to her, "I was in the bathroom!"
So again, Dr's orders are no lifting, bending, twisting, NO DRIVING, No Sex (this un's killin me!), NO FARM WORK. And he cannot take off the back brace. Ernie tried to explain the symptoms he is having now, and how his back is swelled, etc and how it rubs on the brace and causes more pain...they don't care, keep it on. No oral pain meds are allowed until after they see how or if the nerve blocks help. Yikes. Follow up is I think January 22 on the nerve blocks.
So anyway...whew I'm already exhausted and haven't said half of what I want to... :/
I need to go further than 8 years ago.....
11 years ago...wait too far....ummm no it's not....11 years ago we got married, moved to Tennessee and said goodbye to the family who we felt had tortured us beyond measure and said HELLO! to what we thought was the good life! (Young and stupid, young and stupid! that's all I'm saying!)
Ernie got a great paying job working for a construction company almost immediately. LUCRATIVE money....just flowing like honey from the company, to the bank, through our fingers. We were living high on life and high on the hog (no drugs included). Wednesdays were payday. Wednesdays we paid the bills we needed to pay out of that check, went out to eat, went shopping, went to movies...splurged splurged splurged....or better....wasted wasted wasted.....yea, that's what we did LOL
We had a house payment, a car payment, insurance, baby on the way....
Oh yea, baby on the way! That was our DD! We were so excited to become parents! One of the first things we had done with E's first pay from the company was to go put in a baby layaway! We felt that it was most important (niave dumb kids we were!) to have the things we'd need to bring her home first! (We thought of needing a bed/bassinet 1 month before she was due! LOL Dumb Niave, kids we were!) E wasn't into "baby shopping" so I was doing the choosing. I picked an adorable rear facing carseat, a diaper bag, diapers, wipes, coming home outfit, and a blanket. Ernie chose spoons.
SPOONS?! Yea, you read right SPOONS! I asked what do we need spoons for? he said to feed the baby!!
Pick your battles, that's what my mom said, and he was baby shopping....So I totally agreed, yes we definitely need spoons! (I told him later how silly it was, but after she was born!)So anyway, we spent roughly $100 a week on things we wanted....not needed, just wanted. Our grocery bill was about the same each week, so $200 (sometimes less, sometimes more) a pay spent in a week....that's $10,400 a year that I can't tell you what we spent it on now...I can tell you probably only 1/4 of that was spent on actual FOOD.
Wow. I do those numbers and I look back and think what a waste. What we wasted in one year is more than we paid for our home we live in now. WOW.
See, the lesson might be for me after all!
Ok, now I'm really exhausted, definitely have more to tell, type, etc...but I need to think about where this is supposed to be going, etc. etc...
so...
to be continued.................
- Thread starter
- #2,894
Quail_Antwerp
Cold is on the Right, Hot is on The Left
note* italics used probably represents dripping sarcasm...you've been warned....
Ok, so money was good, baby on the way...high on life and in the fast lane to.....well to no where!
We were going absolutely no where.
I sat at home, bored out of my mind, growing my baby belly...Ernie worked and got to see people and the highlight of my day was meeting him for lunch at noon, then booking it home to watch soap operas...but hey, we were COOL! and we were friends with *important* popular people!
I cleaned the our little 2 bedroom house in the mornings to get it out of the way so I could have the rest of my day to....well to be bored!
Once I went to a salon and got my hair cut. Ernie had never seen my natural color, because I kept dying it honey brown instead of leaving it dark.....by the time I had cut my hair, it was down to my waist and my *roots* were showing to my shoulders. I met him for lunch and he said, "Did you darken your hair?" Nope. I just cut off the fake color!
That same day I asked him if I could get a job. I was just soooo bored! Didn't need to work for any reason other than to save myself from an abysmal life of boredom.
Within a week I was hired at the local Arby's! That's right, fast food, and I loved it! It paid for my Burger King cravings (because BK wasn't hiring! ) and I had full time DAY time hours, so I was home in the evenings and in plenty of time to spend the Wednesday check!
We were NOT living paycheck to paycheck...we were never broke....but we didn't put near as much as we should have in savings, either.
So I worked, Ernie worked, we paid bills, spent money, took off work at Christmas and travelled home that first year to visit family...who had to take tons of pics of my "baby bump" then back home and work some more, spend more money...etc etc...
Loved living in Tennessee...sometimes wish we'd never left...but my husband makes the decisions....well, the big ones anyway, about moving, etc. etc.
By the time we moved back to Ohio, I was working for the Almight and Evil Walmart. How cool was I? I was able to transfer my job! That, in my young, immature, 22 year old life, was the total highlight of that time! Transferring my job! How cool and snazzy was I now! (not very!)
So we move back to Ohio, and the spending and waste didn't get much of a break because Ernie landed another high paying job as an assistant manager to Valvoline...you know, the oil changing places....Pretty darn good for someone who only has an 11th grade education!!!
Second baby arrives, we bought my snazzy car.....that was 8 years ago....8 years we've been back in Ohio.....we worked and spent and worked and spent.....left Walmart and went to work for a small retail store (after a short horrible stint as a telemarketer!) where I was pretty much my own boss...took a $1 an hour pay cut, but the hours were MUCH better! No more over night shifts, never worked later than 9 pm except at Christmas time, and my mom watched the kids for a small portion of my check.
Kept spending and spending.
Found the trailer we live in now, bought it on land contract, and moved it in next to my father in law.
Kept spending and spending.
What we see now is that all the spending (vs saving) had us on a downward spiral. Sure, we had a savings account...and we put $ into it, but not nearly enough...We also paid into a Christmas club.
I remember taking a trip to Williamsburg, Va....BOY did I EVER spend on that trip!! It was a family reunion for my maternal grandmother's side of the family, and since I knew that entire side of the family, I wanted to go! Ernie couldn't get off work, but since I had 2 weeks vacation was OK with me going without him. Ernie was working, I was vacationing! DD was 2 and oldest DS was 4 months.
We went to Busch Gardens, we stayed in a condo, we toured Williamsburg, we toured the Norfolk Naval Base, we took a small cruise.....spending spending spending spending....
A year later Ernie and I both took off work and took the kids down to Alabama in my fancy smancy smarty pants teal camaro. Top down the whole way...we were soooooo cool! Spent a week in Alabama visiting family, went to Gulf Shores, cruised around in our car......then we stopped and spent a week in Tennessee visiting friends and going to Land Between the Lakes Landing and swimming and it was Easter, so egg hunts......
Spending and wasting....
The store I worked for closed down, and by that time we were having baby 3. Ernie made enough to cover the bills and still have extra money, so I stayed home with the kids. Not bored at home anymore, three kids, plenty to keep busy!!
We were still not really going anywhere. No goals, no real purpose, and I don't think we were really relying on God. Well, I was warming up a pew on Sunday mornings, but that doesn't count.
Not sure when I figured out I wasn't going the way I was supposed to, or when I gave control back to God, but at some point I did....and I noticed changes....
Changes....oh yea...big changes....
Like the day a Walmart exec came into Valvoline in 2005....BIG Changes....
Told Ernie, "Come work for us, be an assistant manager for us..." and then quoted Ernie an income waaaay more than he was making as an Assistant Manager at Valvoloine.
Can we say S U C K E R!
We didn't really think it through, didn't pray, etc....We just did. Ernie and I discussed it briefly and all we saw was $$ signs.....
Next thing ya know Ernie's put in notice and gone over to the Dark Side..................
And that's where the troubles began.
edited for typos...
Ok, so money was good, baby on the way...high on life and in the fast lane to.....well to no where!
We were going absolutely no where.
I sat at home, bored out of my mind, growing my baby belly...Ernie worked and got to see people and the highlight of my day was meeting him for lunch at noon, then booking it home to watch soap operas...but hey, we were COOL! and we were friends with *important* popular people!
I cleaned the our little 2 bedroom house in the mornings to get it out of the way so I could have the rest of my day to....well to be bored!
Once I went to a salon and got my hair cut. Ernie had never seen my natural color, because I kept dying it honey brown instead of leaving it dark.....by the time I had cut my hair, it was down to my waist and my *roots* were showing to my shoulders.
I met him for lunch and he said, "Did you darken your hair?" Nope. I just cut off the fake color!That same day I asked him if I could get a job. I was just soooo bored! Didn't need to work for any reason other than to save myself from an abysmal life of boredom.
Within a week I was hired at the local Arby's! That's right, fast food, and I loved it! It paid for my Burger King cravings (because BK wasn't hiring!
) and I had full time DAY time hours, so I was home in the evenings and in plenty of time to spend the Wednesday check!We were NOT living paycheck to paycheck...we were never broke....but we didn't put near as much as we should have in savings, either.
So I worked, Ernie worked, we paid bills, spent money, took off work at Christmas and travelled home that first year to visit family...who had to take tons of pics of my "baby bump" then back home and work some more, spend more money...etc etc...
Loved living in Tennessee...sometimes wish we'd never left...but my husband makes the decisions....well, the big ones anyway, about moving, etc. etc.
By the time we moved back to Ohio, I was working for the Almight and Evil Walmart. How cool was I? I was able to transfer my job! That, in my young, immature, 22 year old life, was the total highlight of that time! Transferring my job! How cool and snazzy was I now! (not very!)
So we move back to Ohio, and the spending and waste didn't get much of a break because Ernie landed another high paying job as an assistant manager to Valvoline...you know, the oil changing places....Pretty darn good for someone who only has an 11th grade education!!!
Second baby arrives, we bought my snazzy car.....that was 8 years ago....8 years we've been back in Ohio.....we worked and spent and worked and spent.....left Walmart and went to work for a small retail store (after a short horrible stint as a telemarketer!) where I was pretty much my own boss...took a $1 an hour pay cut, but the hours were MUCH better! No more over night shifts, never worked later than 9 pm except at Christmas time, and my mom watched the kids for a small portion of my check.
Kept spending and spending.
Found the trailer we live in now, bought it on land contract, and moved it in next to my father in law.
Kept spending and spending.
What we see now is that all the spending (vs saving) had us on a downward spiral. Sure, we had a savings account...and we put $ into it, but not nearly enough...We also paid into a Christmas club.
I remember taking a trip to Williamsburg, Va....BOY did I EVER spend on that trip!! It was a family reunion for my maternal grandmother's side of the family, and since I knew that entire side of the family, I wanted to go! Ernie couldn't get off work, but since I had 2 weeks vacation was OK with me going without him. Ernie was working, I was vacationing! DD was 2 and oldest DS was 4 months.
We went to Busch Gardens, we stayed in a condo, we toured Williamsburg, we toured the Norfolk Naval Base, we took a small cruise.....spending spending spending spending....
A year later Ernie and I both took off work and took the kids down to Alabama in my fancy smancy smarty pants teal camaro. Top down the whole way...we were soooooo cool! Spent a week in Alabama visiting family, went to Gulf Shores, cruised around in our car......then we stopped and spent a week in Tennessee visiting friends and going to Land Between the Lakes Landing and swimming and it was Easter, so egg hunts......
Spending and wasting....
The store I worked for closed down, and by that time we were having baby 3. Ernie made enough to cover the bills and still have extra money, so I stayed home with the kids. Not bored at home anymore, three kids, plenty to keep busy!!
We were still not really going anywhere. No goals, no real purpose, and I don't think we were really relying on God. Well, I was warming up a pew on Sunday mornings, but that doesn't count.
Not sure when I figured out I wasn't going the way I was supposed to, or when I gave control back to God, but at some point I did....and I noticed changes....
Changes....oh yea...big changes....
Like the day a Walmart exec came into Valvoline in 2005....BIG Changes....
Told Ernie, "Come work for us, be an assistant manager for us..." and then quoted Ernie an income waaaay more than he was making as an Assistant Manager at Valvoloine.
Can we say S U C K E R!
We didn't really think it through, didn't pray, etc....We just did. Ernie and I discussed it briefly and all we saw was $$ signs.....
Next thing ya know Ernie's put in notice and gone over to the Dark Side..................
And that's where the troubles began.
edited for typos...
Dace
Revolution in Progress
DrakeMaiden
Sourdough Slave
- Joined
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Hi Quail. Hope you don't mind me following along. I don't read in other people's journals very often . . . now I have a better idea of what is up in your world. Sorry to hear the details of your husband's back problem. :/
I like your answering machine message.
You know . . . I think we have all been young and stupid in our lives.
I like your answering machine message.
You know . . . I think we have all been young and stupid in our lives.
delia_peterson
Covered in Compost
DrakeMaiden said:Hi Quail. Hope you don't mind me following along. I don't read in other people's journals very often . . . now I have a better idea of what is up in your world. Sorry to hear the details of your husband's back problem. :/
I like your answering machine message.
You know . . . I think we have all been young and stupid in our lives.
I think alot of us can say yes to that...I know I was. But I would not go back and change anything as it has made me who I am today. Stronger and wiser.
MorelCabin
Quilting Extraordinaire
Well said Delia! So true!delia_peterson said:DrakeMaiden said:Hi Quail. Hope you don't mind me following along. I don't read in other people's journals very often . . . now I have a better idea of what is up in your world. Sorry to hear the details of your husband's back problem. :/
I like your answering machine message.
You know . . . I think we have all been young and stupid in our lives.
I think alot of us can say yes to that...I know I was. But I would not go back and change anything as it has made me who I am today. Stronger and wiser.
FarmerChick
Super Self-Sufficient
- Joined
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- Messages
- 11,417
- Reaction score
- 14
- Points
- 248
young and stupid
oh yes those go together
but you can't change the past.....only thing I always "wish" when I look back is the money I wasted. But it wasn't a "waste then"---LOL---but wish I took my parents advice more strongly...BANK money from your first paycheck ever earned!!!!
oh yes those go together
but you can't change the past.....only thing I always "wish" when I look back is the money I wasted. But it wasn't a "waste then"---LOL---but wish I took my parents advice more strongly...BANK money from your first paycheck ever earned!!!!
- Thread starter
- #2,900
Quail_Antwerp
Cold is on the Right, Hot is on The Left
I know we can't change the past....but back when we were living high on life and spending spending spending wasting wasting wasting....well, I thought my you know what didn't stink and I was just all that plus six bags of chips.
I look at who I was then compared to who I am now, and I sure like me now much more than I like me then! I don't think I'd have been my own friend!
And I really wasn't my own friend.
They (being people) say you have to like yourself before others will like you for you...so I have to wonder, did I like myself???
Umm... don't think I did.....
Oh darnit there's Bon Jovi again....sorry folks he's needing some attention and I'm smelling smoke....oh that's dinner...............
I look at who I was then compared to who I am now, and I sure like me now much more than I like me then! I don't think I'd have been my own friend!
And I really wasn't my own friend.
They (being people) say you have to like yourself before others will like you for you...so I have to wonder, did I like myself???
Umm... don't think I did.....
Oh darnit there's Bon Jovi again....sorry folks he's needing some attention and I'm smelling smoke....oh that's dinner...............
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