dragonlaurel
Improvising a more SS life
Sorry for your loss, but I'm glad you had so much good time with her. She sounds like a great lady. The hospice people are a huge blessing.
2dreams - Its Spring In Mississippi w/pallet bed pic
- Thread starter 2dream
- Start date
Sorry for your loss, but I'm glad you had so much good time with her. She sounds like a great lady. The hospice people are a huge blessing.
noobiechickenlady
Almost Self-Reliant
Glad for the peaceful end to her journey! Praying you will keep peace wrapped around you too.
Henrietta23
Yard Farmer
I am also sorry for your loss. I'm glad you have such wonderful memories of your mother!
murphysranch
Super Self-Sufficient
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Wow. Almost 90 years old, and had her fill of life's challenges. I'm so glad that you were able to enjoy and honor her fully up until recently. You're a good daughter, and she has taught you well.
keljonma
Epicurean Goddess
Wanda, I am sorry to hear about your loss. Isn't it amazing how much our parents can teach us throughout our lives....seems like everything worked to God's plan....
You are all in our prayers.
You are all in our prayers.
- Thread starter
- #297
2dream
Flibbertigibbet
My frustration level is climbing. Went with DH to the Dr. The chemo has not affected the tumor at all. No bigger but no smaller either.
The Dr. said, well folks, its surgery, lets schedule for day after tomorrow. We are like woah, hold up a minute Doc.
This Dr. told us, on first visit, that it was a slight possibility that my DH's Lou Gehrig symptoms were caused by this tumor. However, only certain cancers cause this type of activity. His words to us were: "Its possible this is Lambert-Eaton syndrome caused by the tumor. We need to treat with chemo to see if it shrinks the tumor or makes it go away. If not then it is not Lambert-Eaton syndrome".
Now that the chemo has no affect on the tumor we are back to Lou Gehrig disease. So this man wants DH to have half of his lung removed to get rid of a cancer that will probably never have a chance to kill him.
Our response was No Thank You. Why in the world would you have that aggressive treatment for a tumor the size of a dime, when you have another fatal disease that has no treatment or cure. Why would you spend what little quality time you have left recovering from a major, painful, surgery that requires a very long recovery time? Why in the world would a Dr. even suggest such a thing? And to add insult to injury when he was questioned about this he just dropped his head and said, "I agree with your decision". But yet he never offered it as an option. And even went so far as to say, prior to our questions, that "you have to remain hopeful and optimistic". Why do Dr's offer people false hope? Why do they insist on treatments that they know full well will not help? Is it about the money or is it simply that most people want the false hope and false optimism? I don't really know the answers but I do know that for us, treating a disease just for the sake of treating it at all cost is not the answer. Without some quality, quantity is just not important.
The Dr. said, well folks, its surgery, lets schedule for day after tomorrow. We are like woah, hold up a minute Doc.
This Dr. told us, on first visit, that it was a slight possibility that my DH's Lou Gehrig symptoms were caused by this tumor. However, only certain cancers cause this type of activity. His words to us were: "Its possible this is Lambert-Eaton syndrome caused by the tumor. We need to treat with chemo to see if it shrinks the tumor or makes it go away. If not then it is not Lambert-Eaton syndrome".
Now that the chemo has no affect on the tumor we are back to Lou Gehrig disease. So this man wants DH to have half of his lung removed to get rid of a cancer that will probably never have a chance to kill him.
Our response was No Thank You. Why in the world would you have that aggressive treatment for a tumor the size of a dime, when you have another fatal disease that has no treatment or cure. Why would you spend what little quality time you have left recovering from a major, painful, surgery that requires a very long recovery time? Why in the world would a Dr. even suggest such a thing? And to add insult to injury when he was questioned about this he just dropped his head and said, "I agree with your decision". But yet he never offered it as an option. And even went so far as to say, prior to our questions, that "you have to remain hopeful and optimistic". Why do Dr's offer people false hope? Why do they insist on treatments that they know full well will not help? Is it about the money or is it simply that most people want the false hope and false optimism? I don't really know the answers but I do know that for us, treating a disease just for the sake of treating it at all cost is not the answer. Without some quality, quantity is just not important.
Dace
Revolution in Progress
Wanda you have a lot on your plate, you and your family are in my prayers.
lalaland
Lovin' The Homestead
argghhh, I am so sorry you are dealing with that dr. I've had similiar experiences - i think they are just on autopilot and so focused on the one item that they forget the whole picture.
maybe he was hanging his head in shame that he didn't take the time to look at everything.
its a long journey, and western medicine isn't always set up for it. I'll be thinking of you and your family.
maybe he was hanging his head in shame that he didn't take the time to look at everything.
its a long journey, and western medicine isn't always set up for it. I'll be thinking of you and your family.
Farmfresh
City Biddy
I think most doctors think people EXPECT a medical solution. It is hard to suggest someone live well until they die. Sort of catches in their throats.
By the way I agree with YOUR decision.
My mom had esophageal cancer. The doctor brought her a surgical "cure" which included deflating a lung, cutting her esophagus in half then reconnecting her stomach with it again, but this time located in her chest BESIDE her heart!
She was unable to lay down for the last years of her life as the stomach contents would "fall" out! After the surgery she spent 8 weeks in ICU, coded three times, another 8 months in physical therapy to learn to speak again, due to complications of the medication. Developed spastic breathing due to the lung deflate and re inflate procedure. She "lived" another 2 1/2 years.
I don't think I would EVER choose that quality of life, just to have a bit more of it.
By the way I agree with YOUR decision.
My mom had esophageal cancer. The doctor brought her a surgical "cure" which included deflating a lung, cutting her esophagus in half then reconnecting her stomach with it again, but this time located in her chest BESIDE her heart!
She was unable to lay down for the last years of her life as the stomach contents would "fall" out! After the surgery she spent 8 weeks in ICU, coded three times, another 8 months in physical therapy to learn to speak again, due to complications of the medication. Developed spastic breathing due to the lung deflate and re inflate procedure. She "lived" another 2 1/2 years.
I don't think I would EVER choose that quality of life, just to have a bit more of it.
