Gasp! family NOT supportive part time income from raising chickens

[maf8009]

Thanks for the support.... really thanks you all keep the ideas and support coming... please.....I just need to do for ME and realize
I will not get help in anyform and that a successful family business (the vending company) I will do with out their support.

The chickens DO make me money in barter and cash. ( I have close to 500 and city people will pay $20 for one hen!, not country folk!!! )

See, the money from 150 hens (not counting barter) will buy ONE vending machine..... and so on..... 3 machines income will buy 2 more and this is a self sustaining CASH business.

Plus, I have friends in the vending business that can help me....

Oh! I wish the family would be interested. I'll just do my own thing and LET THEM ALL GO....This is NOT easy, to let them sink or swim.... Its really loanly

I agree with all of the great input you have received already.

Stop 'doing' for everyone else and start 'doing' for you. Your children are adults with no respect for you. It is time to nudge them out of the nest (emotionally) and live for your self.

Perhaps when you start living for yourself and doing what makes you happy your husband and your children will develop a new respect for you.

You can do it!!!

 

[Quail_Antwerp]

I think you've been given some good advice, but I wanted to chime in here and say-

Please do not cancel your life insurance! Change your beneficiary if you don't want your husband or kids to get it, but do not cancel the life insurance! Especially not if it's one that covers your funeral expenses.

 

[noobiechickenlady]

Wow... I mean really. I cannot imagine being that disrespectful of my mother. We disagree on occasion, sometimes it gets pretty heavy, but still. If I had ever told her to Shut up, even without the expletive, I'd have been up against the wall & picking my teeth off the floor. And she's 8" shorter than me.

They're grown now, so there's not much you can do to change their attitudes.

You've gotten good advice here. Get your own account, don't give anyone else access to it.
And then, when you've got a nice little nest egg built, take a trip to Tahiti or St. Thomas. Alone. Or take your best friend.

 

[Wifezilla]

This is NOT easy, to let them sink or swim.... Its really loanly

When you stop spending time and effort on people who don't appreciate you, suddenly you have time to develop new friendships.

 

[okiegirl1]

Wow... I mean really. I cannot imagine being that disrespectful of my mother. We disagree on occasion, sometimes it gets pretty heavy, but still. If I had ever told her to Shut up, even without the expletive, I'd have been up against the wall & picking my teeth off the floor. And she's 8" shorter than me.

They're grown now, so there's not much you can do to change their attitudes.

You've gotten good advice here. Get your own account, don't give anyone else access to it.
And then, when you've got a nice little nest egg built, take a trip to Tahiti or St. Thomas. Alone. Or take your best friend.

... or one of us!!

 

[PamsPride]

On your new business adventure!!

Whoa doggie! If any of my kids were to talk to me like those ADULTS do to you God help them!!

You have NO obligation to give your ADULT children money for ANYTHING!!

You have made money in a business before you can do it again! I totally agee...hire some teenagers that WANT to work for you!
Congrats on making money on your chicken business! Please do come back here and keep us updated!!

 

[Farmfresh]

Well first the kids are all legal adults... Out they go! I was the horrible mean mommy and kicked all of mine out by the age of 19 if they hadn't got out on their own. They will thank you later... after they get used to working hard to eat! Times are hard they need to pull their own weight.

Next of all my family was not historically particularly supportive of my homesteading efforts. I did start my weird ways way before kids however, so they grew up with the knowledge of how weird their mom was.

They still make comments about me being out "playing in my garden" but I don't pay any attention. I do it for me and I do it for all of us, whether they get it or not.

Not worth breaking the family over.

 

[Ldychef2k]

It crazy, but this reminds me of Henny Penny. Ironically, a chicken ! Remember, she kept asking for help and didn't get it, until it came time to reap the benefits?

No one wants to help, so no one gets any of the money, or anything that can be purchased with money. Keep the money completely separate from the household, shelter it somehow.

Tailor your business so that it is within your own personal ability to do the work alone, or with hired help. Expect nothing from anyone, and do not support anyone who does not help.

And DO NOT TAKE CRAP FROM ANYONE. They do it because then can. You are the only one who can stop them, and you do it with calm assertiveness and by taking action when things happen that you do not allow. Empty threats ain't gonna cut it.

Easy to say, hard to pull off.

Signed, the voice of experience.

 

[SheriM]

I think we all need support when we start a new venture and, as time goes on, to keep up the interest and enthusiasm, but that support doesn't necessarily have to come from family members. If you decide to do this, do it for YOU (as so many have said) and then seek the support you need from other sources, like your friends who are already in the vending business.

My situation is very different from yours but there are some parallels. Due to my DH's dementia, he can't provide much in the way of emotional support for my ventures and only very little practical support (helping with things, etc) so I've learned to find other like-minded people to share my triumphs and heartaches. A lot of them are on this forum. It's a great place to share all the good times and the bad ones too.

 

[FarmerChick]

WOW that is rough definitely.

You sound so sad and confused.

Take time now to think carefully how you want to proceed and what decision you end up with SHOULD be best for YOU. No one else.

I haven't been in this situation.....so best advice is relax, think slowly, breathe, don't get mad or angry-----just find the best solution for YOU. and then move forward directly toward your goals for YOU.


best of luck