How would you handle somone's insistence in this situation?

[Wannabefree]

I am going on a short trip with ladies from church. It is a two day retreat, and I am VERY nervous about the food they will serve. My soy allergy is getting worse every time I am exposed. Unlike most soy allergy sufferers, I react to lecithin and soybean oil which contain less of the protein that causes reaction. The lady who is in charge of this retreat is insisting on bringing special snacks etc. for me, but I am already super phobic of eating anything I do not prepare myself. I do NOT have an Epi-pen because I am currently only self diagnosed, and have not been to a doctor in....uh....quite a while I know what I react to, no doubt. How do I get this woman to understand?! It is almost to the point I don't want to go on the trip I know she is trying to be nice, and make me comfortable, but really...TOO much fuss over something I can handle myself. I have told her all this...I'm beggining to think I will never get through to her that I am bringing my food or I will not be attending. :/ I am trying very hard to not just blurt out that I am bringing my own food and there is NOTHING you can do about it WHY do people not understand? It is so frustrating

 

[moolie]

If you think she won't listen, don't bother explaining further. You've said what you need to say and told her not to bother and it's up to her to listen and act accordingly based on the fact that you will be bringing your own food. You can't really do any more.

Just bring what you need and take care of yourself while you are away--nothing worse than not being at home and being sick (with people who don't understand to boot).

 

[Wannabefree]

nothing worse than not being at home and being sick (with people who don't understand to boot).

I know

 

[Leta]

You have every right to bring your own food and eat only that. Be nice, but firm. If she brings special stuff for you, that is her issue. You are not obligated to eat it.

My 2c.

 

[FarmerChick]

look her straight in the eye and say you only eat your own prepared food because YOUR ALLERGY is that severe.

I would think that would end it right there.


sounds like a fun trip....enjoy it!!

 

[Sunny]

I dont know.

Maybe just let her be nice and bring you extra snacks. Just dont bring up the subject of food to much, maybe she will stop being pushy or worrying about this topic. Just an idea. Maybe she saw how worried you are about the food, so she is now worrying about it along with you. And she doesnt want any thing to happen to you.

I would let this nice lady bring you some snacks. But I think I would bring my own food also. Because some people dont read the ingredients list carefully. Some times they hide soy in lots of stuff you wouldnt even think of it as being there. Ive started ready labels closely lately. But no allergies here yet.

I would just do my own thing. Let the nice lady do hers. And not worry about it to much and enjoy your trip.

 

[Wannabefree]

Thanks ya'll! I just wanted to double check that *I* have done everything that *I* can do, so I am off the hook if she brings...whatever. I should NOT feel obligated to eat there because I have VERY CLEARLY stated my concerns. Okay, that was easy Just double checking that I could make myself clear with what I had said to her and there was nothing left unsaid. The rest, is her problem then. I can live with that

 

[moolie]

See, there you go--it's unanimous. I know it can feel confrontational to do your own thing when someone is as insistent as this lady sounds like she is being, but it's your health we're talking about and you know what is best. She is likely just trying to be super accommodating so that you don't have to prepare and pack anything, rather than annoying because she truly doesn't understand--best of intentions and all that. Do what you need to do.

I have mild lactose-intolerance and I'm a Girl Guide leader so I go on lots of camp-outs throughout the year. Where the girls and other people often buy, prepare, and cook much of the food. I have to outright just not eat certain foods or I know they'll send me to the outhouse for the rest of the weekend, so I bring my own food to keep me going when everyone else is having things that are full of cheese etc. It took time to not feel weird about it, but as intolerances and allergies are on the upswing we often have girls in the group that have special diet concerns as well, so I'm usually not alone in not being able to eat certain things.

 

[Kala]

My aunt also has severe allergies to soy, among many other things. From experience I can tell ya some people just DO NOT get it and probably never will. And it really really really irritates me when people insist on "Oh you can't just take one bite?" or "Well just a couple of days of it won't hurt right?" Uummm NO!! An allergy is an allergy.

For whatever reason some people just do not get the severity of it. And what can truly happen if a bad enough reaction occurs. I for one would certaintly not risk my life over not knowing how someone prepared something, and people just do not get that. There is unfortunately way too much cross contamination that can happen, and that's not something that people with no experience in this area even consider.

Some friends and family members thought my aunt was "...just putting on a show, probably a panic attack..." when she was first diagnosed.

Ok, I'll remove the soap box now. Sorry, this sort of thing just really irritates me (mostly b/c of the bad experiences). Especially when people are pushy for no good reason. If you want to bring your own food, what's it to her? I would just look in the eye and tell her I'm only gonna say this once, either I bring my own food or I don't come. Plain and simple. I'm not trying to be rude, but that's how severe this situation is. And if you can't or won't understand that then I guess this isn't the trip for me.

 

[Henrietta23]

Ugh, definitely bring your own food and let her deal with it. I go through this with people at our church who insist on trying to provide snacks they think my son can eat then get MAD at me when I say no.