Lorihadams-- hi guys...been busy!

[lorihadams]

Thanks, I know I put a lot of pressure on myself but I think that because I WAS a school teacher others put even more on me.

I really like Charlotte Mason's approach. We read a lot in this house and I am struggling to get hubby to understand that I don't want him to punish our children by taking away their reading time. Take away their stuff but don't take away that time with us together.

When I try to explain that we don't really do a lot of school type activities yet people look at me like I'm crazy. My kids have learned more by going outside and exploring their environment than a lot learn in the classroom.

I know my kids are okay, people comment on how articulate they are and no one can believe that they are only 3 and 5. I just have to convince myself to not take criticism too much to heart.

When one of the other homeschool moms asked me why I decided to homeschool I laughed. Here's why.

When I taught in the public school system it was in a poorer county. When I had my children we were living in one of the poorest countys in the state. I had kids that came to school in their pajamas cause "daddy didn't come home last night and we couldn't figure out how to run the washer" Six years old and home alone all night. I had another student that had a single mom that worked 2 jobs and he was responsible for his other brothers and sisters. He couldn't get his own homework done cause of taking care of all his siblings' needs.The school systems just aren't able to function with the low number of teachers, high number of students, low funding, low moral, and lack of technology and resources. Too many kids fall through the cracks. I don't want my children to be one of those kids that hates learning because the school system sucks. I loved the actual school work when I was in school but hated going to school because of the social aspect. My brother was just the opposite, loved the social stuff but hated being made to sit at a desk 8 hrs a day--he's very much a hands on learner.

Case in point, my old neighbor came to me and asked if I could tutor her son (3rd or 4th grade at the time) in math. I said, send him over and I'll take a look at what he's got and we'll see from there. He was at my house 15 minutes before I sent him home. He knew how to do math, he had a reading comprehension problem. She called me when he got home and asked if everything was okay and I told her that she needed to get him in with the reading specialist at school and explain to his math teacher that she needed to help him understand the directions and work with him on time limits until the reading specialist could get him up to par. In two weeks with the specialist he was doing much better. The teacher just assumed he was lazy or trying to get out of doing his work. The problem was that any time they did multiple choice or word problems it took him so long to figure out what to do and read all the possible answers that he couldn't possibly finish the entire test or assignment in the time allotted so he just circled random answers just to finish if he finished at all. It took me 15 minutes of one on one time to figure out what was going on but with 100 other kids to deal with, who has 15 minutes to sit down with one?

I also know how my kids learn and my son would be in the principal's office all the time. He can't sit still, he is very hands on and meticulous, he likes to ask questions, he gets bored easily, all the things that would get him in trouble at school.

He's 5 and doesn't know how to read yet but that's cause he can't sit still long enough to do it. He can sound out words just fine, knows all his alphabet, numbers, can count by 1s and 10s, can add and subtract some, knows a lot about science stuff, and can write some when he will sit still long enough. He's doing fine and I know it but that doesn't change the perception of homeschool to outsiders. The one thing that is good is that there is a very large (and growing) population of homeschoolers in this county.

 

[Javamama]

I didn't know you were a teacher! Cool. Your kids are really lucky.They aren't going to be one of 'those kids', because you care and you will make sure of that.
I apologize in advance if I come off too blunt. It's my type 4 nature coming out. When people ask for help, I boil down what I see and give it to them straight. Sometimes it's hard to convey the love with what I say.

If it makes you feel any better, my son didn't talk until he was almost 4, but now he's at the top of his 5th grade class. So what if he's 5 and doesn't know how to read? He seems way ahead of most 5 year olds I know. What's the hurry? I'm sorry, I just don't get it. They will learn soon enough, it's not like there's a deadline and then it's too late. (I want to convey that my tone is not intending to be harsh, just asking frank questions) Is it because you feel his learning reflects on you as a teacher?

My daughter insisted every color was pink until she was 4. She's now a really good artist and swims in color.

 

[TanksHill]

Lori, it really sounds like you have a perfect grasp on your children's education. I didn't know you were a teacher either. The explanation of the school system really puts things in perspective.

When my kids were 3 and 5 the 3 yo went to a faith based pre school that focused on play. The 5 yo started kinder. He went from 8 to 12 and that included two play times and snack, chapel twice a week.. I can understand totally how you don't want to over do it.

Roll on sister!!!

 

[Dace]

Java, it sounds to me that Lori knows her kids are fine....it is the outside pressure of proving it to others. Which sucks. Lori, make like a duck and let it roll rit off your back!

I SOOOOOO wanted to HS my 8 yr old, desperately! But I could not convince my Hubby that it was better than the public school that our other three were in. My youngest is extremely bringht and in a designated class with other smarty pants. She is doing well, but I still can't help but ponder how much more she would be able to learn and or experience if 8-2 school was not in the way. In many cases I believe that public school just holds kids back.

On the news is morning the school district superintendent was announcing how many millions they needed to cut next year, 125 mil I think. He said ' it is going to really hurt, cutting right down to the bone. SD public education is really going to suffer' yikes, you know it is going to get bad when the super is saying that!

Let's just say that is dreading the next few years.

 

[Javamama]

I know, I was trying to figure out a nice way to tell her to tell everyone where to go because it's not their business and instead went overboard in the "your kid is fine department" I think I need another cuppa joe this morning.

 

[savingdogs]

I've considered going back to homeschooling my youngest, but gosh, I'm not very equipped...and you sound like you had the perfect background to homeschool!

I have known people whose children could read at a very young age and it did not help them later in school. They were not socially developed enough and then were bored during reading time because ABCs were really old stuff when you could read second grade level.

I think your approach to your kids, especially considering their ages, is fine. They will have plenty of time to sit at a desk and write papers.

 

[lorihadams]

Honestly, having a teaching degree is more of a hinderance than a help. :/

I had to deprogram myself to homeschool. At first I wanted to sit them down and "do school" and I had to pull it back and just let them breathe.

I think my problem is that, along with the outside pressure, I am burnt out. Part of it is seasonal. Happens to everyone this time of year. There is less to do in the community that we can draw from and less time outdoors because of the weather. Everyone's reaction when they get burnt out is to usually shut down. I'm shutting down.

I need to set aside some designated time to do activities, school related or not, with the kids everyday and stick to it. I am thinking right after lunch cause they are full and ready to sit still for a bit.

I think the art class is kind of steep too. $90 for the first child and $75 per child after that. They are doing art history, a different style/artist each week. Part of me thinks, okay it would be fun but another part of me thinks, I could do that myself for free.

See, I do it to myself. They like going to hang out with the other kids but to sit through a "class" with a store bought curriculum is kinda tough for me.

My son loves to be on the computer too! He would do it for hours if I let him. There are several sites with educational games that he loves and will do for hours on his own. DD wants to do dress up games and online coloring. She loves her fashion

 

[Shiloh Acres]

Most of what I can say is I feel for you. Your DH does need to understand that you are doing SEVERAL jobs, and everyone else needs to get off your back about what they are doing. Sigh.

I homeschooled mine, and I now teach a tiny private class of 3-5 year olds. So I can really relate.

It sounds to me like your son is doing great and is very typical. You are a teacher, so if you taught younger ones, you surely know some kids don't pick up on doing seatwork at a young age, want to do their own thing, print later, etc. I like to make sure they are doing something for fine motor, but they will eventually write. My homeschooler didn't want to write so I took dictation, and didn't make a big deal through the first few school years. Everything turned out fine.

I have kids now I allow to circle the answer instead of coloring it in. I have them color certain pages according to directions first, then they can go back and do what they want after I check it. I do find that praising specific things in one child causes another to raise their own bar and work harder (your mother will love how neatly you colored this ... You outlined the edges and stayed in the lines!). I have to be careful because they are very competitive and one little girl is quick to say "but mine isn't good?" or "but his mom won't be happy?" depending whether she's receiving praise or someone else. She's overly dramatic though and I just have to be very matter of fact with her. Rewards work great with competitive kids, but I find I have to be sensitive. I try to use their competitive instincts to advantage and minimize the problems from it. It's always a balancing act.

The advantage you have is knowing your kids and being able to teach to their personalities. The disadvantage is the same one I have with such a small class ... They always need my attention and check in with me constantly. I'm trying to wean them a bit from that so they will fit into the slightly larger classes when they level up, but it's not buying me any time to prepare. I usually am right there bouncing between them. Computer time helps, as do games I set up for them to play. I find games played in a regular way induce too much competition in this group, so I set up a table with small stuffed animals and one child at a time gets to be the teacher and plays the game to see which animal will win. Even then I get grumbling or cheating if their favorite toy is "losing".

I'm with you on the school situation, and mine is not nearly as bad. I have one who is almost always 30 min to an hour late and either shows up eating a breakfast sandwich or so hungry he can't focus on anything but snacktime.

As far as history, I HATED history in school, just memorizing all those facts. I LOVED teaching history! We used biographies, and books that let kids make things relating to a place/time. We sometimes did a co-op and let the kids put on a play. We watched videos. We pretended to be news reporters and wrote articles and interviews. We made dioramas. We branched history into science often. There are some
wonderful resources out there. We had a LOT of fun.

My kids now are totally involved in things if I act them out for them in a silly way, and they remember much better. I never used that with homeschooling, but it works great with these kids. Maybe too much tv exposure, but almost all kids love silly.

I think you are doing great. Don't stress over what people criticize you are or are not doing. Your kids are so young now ... Better they learn to love learning and develop a healthy curiosity. A good foundation of information is good, and basic skills, but don't worry about 8 hours of seatwok. I usually finished school in 4-5 hours a day with an older child VERY interested in academics with a heavy schedule (all the required stuff along with Bible, ancient and American history, foreign languages, very in-depth writing and composition, typing and web design, and probably a few more subjects I'm forgetting.). We did so much it was hard to design a log. Oh, and that was typically just 4 days a week. We normally didn't school on Friday. Through middle school, with all of that, we required only 4-5 hours a day.

Little kids need more exploration and hands-on and attention, but they certainly don't need more seatwork than that.

Sorry for the rambling. I'm on a phone and been typing for about an hour, getting interrupted (at home not school today LOL). So I hope I made some sense. Just take it easy on yourself, and see if you get your DH to better understand. I hope you can get your son to stop picking on his sister too -- at least for periods of time to restore your sanity.

 

[Bubblingbrooks]

Ok, now that you mention that you were a teacher at one point, I understand.
My SIL used to teach, She homeschools, and even after all these years, she is still trying to conform her children and their work into the PS model.

She is STRESSED, and so are the kids and their dad. Busier then if they were to go to PS.
It does not work.

I would see about paying for the art class as you go, and spend that hour a week networking with the other moms, to see how they are making things work.
There is strength an encouragement in numbers.
And who knows, you may find an older student who could come in as a teachers helper once a week to tutor for you!

 

[lorihadams]

Well....I just got done cooking dinner for tonight and tomorrow night. Cooked up a big batch of ground deer meat, split it and made tacos and a lasagna for tomorrow. Maddie played with play doh at the kitchen table while I was cooking and Tyler played a couple different games online.

It's supposed to snow a little tonight but not much until Sunday night/Monday. Hubby is not going to like that, he has hunting clients tomorrow and Monday. It's harder to hunt a field with snow on the ground....no where for the birds to land and it covers up their food source.

I think I may spend some time looking at the SOLs (standards of learning....jeez I hate Virginia sometimes) and see what we need to do. That way I can get in some stuff I know we need to cover but in a fun way. I told hubby today that I was just burnt out and needed to regroup.

I was also just informed that his second hand acoustic guitar that he wants to buy is $400. I told him to tell his cousin that we would take it for a month to try it out and then pay him to see if it was really gonna be something he sticks with. If not we would return the guitar. I think that's fair.

I also took some time to walk my property in the back today and try to decide where I want the goat fencing to go and where to put the bees and the garden. I am thinking that I may move the garden to the back corner next to the chicken run since it is already fenced in on one side. I could easily get 6, maybe 8 4x4 raised beds in there and it would be next to my blueberry bushes. IT would have morning shade but get full sun by about 10-11 am until dark. Since it is right next to the chicken run getting the water hose to it wouldn't be a problem and I could do a compost pile nearby. It would also be close to the shed which is gonna house the goats. One lean to is going to be the goat house/milking parlor and the other lean to will be hay storage with the shed housing all my supplies, gardening tools, feed, extra freezer and SS supplies.

We need to build a one car garage for hubby's tools and we want to attach a 2 car carport to it to keep the vehicles out of the weather.

The stuff that needed to be fixed at the other house has been done but I haven't seen a bill yet and we need gravel badly for the driveway. The only thing left to do at the old house is the septic pumped out. I'll be glad when it is done.

I wrote the check for my 2 nucs at last nights beek meeting. I have everything for my hives so far...may need to order 2 shallow supers later but I'm not that worried about it now.

Got a lot to get done and no time to do it in. The goat house and fence is first on the priority list. Then comes the garden. Bees are done but I have to decide where I'm gonna put them.