Murphysranch - Bank blues and garage sale thoughts

[murphysranch]

My, how my early morning time awake has changed. I wake up around 2:30 in the morning, and my brain turns on, reviewing things stored there. It goes on for 1 - 2 hours before I fall back asleep. I'm not sure that I'm solving any issues, or worrying about things, but nevertheless, my brain and body do this.

Before escaping the rat race: managing a trigger sensitive explosive boss; EBITDA, contract negotiations; client satisfaction levels; Salesforce.com rollout; Fox Pro vs Java programmers; mergers and acquisitions in the industry; mortgage and two lines of credit on the house.

After escaping the rat race: BOSS; oak leaves in my chicken run; piggy to market timing; seed order placed on eBay; how to set up the greenhouse for seeds after ripping out the miserable citrus trees; build some grow lights for seeds; fermentation research; dispatching or selling two of my gorgeous roos; two weeks of rain coming and how to divert water off new plantings so they don't drown.

Yes siree, things have sure changed.

 

[murphysranch]

I made bread yesterday! Dragged out the 15 year old breadmachine. I don't think I've used it for over 8 years. Found the ingredients along with the bread flour and yeast that I bought from Costco. Threw it all in on the manual setting. After it beeped at me for a while, I transferred it to a glass loaf pan. I tossed all my metal ones in the garage sale box cus they were gross, rusty, etc. Let it double in size while sitting over top the heater vent on the floor. Baked it off and was I disappointed.

I've got a new range/stove and haven't found the oven thermometer yet to be able to calibrate. The top got too brown, the loaf proofed over the edges of the pan, it was hard to get out of the pan, and the final cooled product was way too difficult to slice cus of the hard crust and soft middle. Only warmed butter saved the product.

Off to try again today, cus again today its raining cats and dogs and blowing like a fiend. We had a 25 foot lacey cedar type tree fall over during the night. Its the second of its kind to do so. There was a pair planted by the previous owners, and the first one fell over right after we bought the property a couple of years ago. We strung it up, and its survived for slightly less than a year before it completely died. It was sad to see that the tree was purchased in a burlap bag, so it must have been expensive and large at that time. The burlap wasn't even disturbed. I"m sure that both trees have the same issue - that whomever planted it, didn't slice or remove the burlap before planting. With our heavy clay soil, its important to fully amend the hole and loosen up the roots carefully before planting anything. Poor tree.

Before it started raining, over the weekend I pruned all my roses. I moved 8 Jackson Perkins roses from our Silicon Valley home up to this new place last March. They survived the move and the 100 degrees heat up here. So it felt good to reshape them again. I've also got about 10 more in some huge half wine barrels that the previous owner of the house had placed on the property. Three of the barrels are 6 feet and two are 10 feet across. I filled them with roses a couple of years ago, sort of an indicator of if the deer were getting over our fence to get the new grape vines. No deer and gorgeous roses.

We've got standing water everywhere today, very high winds, and are sure glad that we removed some of the nearby oaks while we were putting in the foundation of the new home. Hunkering down in Northern CA foothills.

 

[murphysranch]

I'm back. Been a difficult few weeks. My step father had Parkinsons for the last 10 years or so. He's been on quite a number of drugs and it was keeping the ravages of the disease at a slower pace. He was having trouble walking, and couldn't climb stairs, so they put in a stair lift and he used a cane and sometimes a walker for stability.

Well, in late January, my mother and Don had their Sunday nite monthly bridge group over. They had dinner, played a few rounds of couples bridge (12 ppl), then dessert. Then a couple more games of bridge. At around 11:30, the guests left and mother and Don went upstairs to get ready for bed. All of a sudden, Don started slurring his words, mumbling, not making any sense. Mother thought of a stroke and asked him to raise his arms. No problem. But then when he went into the bathroom to go, he fell off the toilet, hit his head on the tile and really started to be more incorherent. Mother was going to dial 911, but he layed there and said, "no no no 9111111111111111...." Mother dialed it behind her back, heard them answer and then hung up. Sure enuf, they immediately called back and she answered the phone, as if she had never made any calls.

The paramedics arrived and stabilized him enough to go to the local hospital in an ambulance. In the meantime, mother's best friend who had been there that evening, came over to drive mother to the hospital. They were there for 6 hours as the Dr's found that Don had pneunomia (no symptoms), and gave him a swallowing test. He failed all 6 levels of the swallowing test. The muscles had given out, and all that he was eating was partially going into his lungs, with no cough reflex. The next day in ICU, they did a trach , at which point he got the MRSA infection, and it went downhill from there. I arrived in town the day they put him on life support.

His diagnosis was that his trach was now permanent, he'd never be able to eat or drink anything, that he'd be fed thru a tube. After 8 days in ICU, and the continuing decline in his health, we decided to remove him from life support. He hung onto life and he continued to try to communicate with us, via writing. I was the best at making the scribble intelligible, as he went in and out of lucidity. I and Mother and my sister stayed by his side for nine more days. His son came by every evening but his daughter in Hawaii couldn't come over. His brother in South Carolina said good bye to him over the phone. My brothers and their wives dropped by when they could.

All I could do was to hold his hand. Given the MRSA infection, and that he'd been moved up to the cancer ward to allow him to die without transporting him to a critical care center, we all had to suit up, with gown, gloves and mask. Day after day, we sat in his room, changing the hand holding patrol. As he declined further, he would become very agitated, and would squeeze my hand until it hurt, and a tear would run down his cheek. They would then up his morphine and give him atterol (??) to calm him down. He continued to try to write, even wanted to know when the upcoming cruise to Alaska was (a true event they had planned).

By Feb 14th, the smell in the room changed as along with him. Mind you, the nurses and his Dr were angels. Two times a day, they did a complete change of linens (putting crisp, creased from folds, white linens on his bed), gown, washed his face, brushed his teeth, smoothed cream on his arms and hands, suctioned his trach. Nurses are special angels sent by Heaven to care for the sick. A thankless job for sure, but they were steadfast in their care of him. When the smell changed, we then knew his time was coming. He passed on a Tuesday morning as mother and I were driving to the hospital to sit with him. 83 years old, engineer, nuclear expert, voracious reader, master at racquetball, excellent at bridge, and LOVED my mother for 27 years with complete devotion. (and she's difficult to love).

I stayed another week with mother to get paperwork organized. He did all the bills and investing and she didn't know his "system".

Came home for a day, and then DH and I went on a long planned trip to San Diego for a week. I'm home again, and will return to mother's next Monday for another week to help her with more paperwork, and to conduct the gathering of friends and family at their clubhouse as his memorial.

I;ve missed all of you, even tho you don't know me well. I've not done anything to be self sufficient, but instead learned alot about hospitals, medical care, nurses, finances, Neptune Society (cremation), death certificates, how every bank and other groups "needs" a death cert to do anything (sheesh...), and about love and compassion that I didn't know I had within me for the sick and ailing.

-Barbara

 

[kcsunshine]

to you Barbara. I'm sorry for your loss.

We had my dad at home and with the help of Hospice he was able to die in peace in his own home. He hated hospitals. We all had to chip in and stay with Mom around the clock because she just wasn't able to care for him. It takes it's toll on your mind and body.

You deserve a long rest.

 

[TanksHill]

I am so sorry for your loss.

g

 

[ohiofarmgirl]

gosh. sorry that must have been rough. i survived the deaths of both of my parents. its a hard thing to watch and you are very brave.

hang in there.

 

[gettinaclue]

I am incredibly sorry. I wish I knew something to say that could bring you comfort.

 

[Farmfresh]

So sorry. I know that stuff is incredibly hard.

We are glad to have you back with us.

 

[FarmerDenise]

Gosh that must have been hard on you and your family. I am so sorry. It is nice to have you back.

 

[Dace]

I am so sorry for your loss. He sounds like a wonderful man, and you are a wonderful daughter to be there for both he and your mom.

We are glad to have you back too!