I just recently forgave my abusive father, he isnt expected to make it much longer and I am greatful I had the chance. It was good for my healing. He is much smaller on the monster scale now that I took away his power. ANd I believe I can let go of him now without any left over feelings. I know he did the best he could and I appreciate the good and forgive the crap. And I told him so. So no left over emotions. He can't hurt me anymore.
So sorry that your family is experiencing this moment of grief and hoping everything will resolve itself alright.
At this point I'm not even sure my father is still alive, or where he is at. I've forgiven him for the past, but I'm not ready to forget the past or to start fresh. I've worked through my feelings on the subject, peacefully resolved it within myself, and have moved on so at this point he is essentially a stranger that I have no real interest or animosity in/towards.
Very glad Hubby got the chance. Seems like it was a healer for many of you.
My mother was abusive. Still is, even in her high-80's. It took my sister's young daughter telling her off to make her see how horrible she is, so now she's making an effort to listen. That's a positive step. Should she pass any time soon, I'm ok with how it all ends.
Hubby came home last night. I've never seen him so torn up. This will certainly take time, patience and understanding. And it helped that the puppy really missed him and showed it.
Puppy will be staying with his breeder so he'll get to spend lots of time with his siblings and mom. Glad we won't have to worry about him howling when we leave for the funeral and services.
I'm so sorry for all that you and your family are going through. I know nothing I can say will help, but just know that I and so many people on here are hoping for the best for you all. You are in our thoughts and prayers.
Quick note. Viewing yesterday. Went well. MIL here too even tho divorced from FIL 12+ years ago. She told my Hubby (her son) that viewings are stupid! Not very nice; could tell it hurt his feelings but I held my tongue.
Service today at FIL's church. Very nice. Actually, all of his church members went on and on about how FIL was such a wonderful man. Good and helpful. But wondered why FIL didn't talk about his family much. Of course, I didn't tell them about how he was abusive and hated the responsibility of raising kids and being faithful to his wife. Again, kept my mouth shut.
I did cry at the service. Not because I'll miss the old coot, but because I was so sad that he'd fooled so many people about his true nature. Or maybe that he'd changed his ways but didn't allow himself to apologize to his children. NO matter, I cried, mostly, for lost chances.
The Uncle who took FIL's guns instead of giving them to Hubby was here. Didn't mention them. Thinking Hubby should write a letter next week, thanking him for coming to FIL's service, and asking when he thought he might be sending or bringing the guns to Hubby since it was one of his most fondest memories of time spent with his dad.
Hubby taking a nap now. Most people have gone home. Meeting his sis and a few other people for dinner in a few. Already have 2 people vying to buy FIL's farm. One of which will be at dinner.
We'll see.
Don't have time to read journals or postings right now. But will catch up next week. Meanwhile, everyone enjoy your day.