me&thegals
A Major Squash & Pumpkin Lover
MMmmmpphh! What?!? I cannot believe what people will say to another person! Well, there's one bennie of being less endowed. I guarantee I have never had nor will have THAT question.delia_peterson said:
What is the rudest thing anyone has ever said to you?
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me&thegals
A Major Squash & Pumpkin Lover
Oh boy. I just don't get it.Dace said:Well this is an indirect rudeness, but my MIL tales pride in the fact that she has never *looked * at my chickens. She has seen them out the window but has never intentionally walked out to see them....and she is proud of that fact
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Stupidest thing I have ever said? I am a redhead naturally, but was dyed blonde in high school. So, I asked a girl with jet black hair if her head got hotter than mine in bright sunlight. What a stupid thing to ask !!!!
I think people are just insensitive & don not think about what they are saying... but I have also had my share of rude remarks & couldn't help but retort....
Our youngest child is (adopted) bi-racial. First let me say that although all 3 of my kids are not born of our body - they were born in our hearts! We love them as much or possibly more than some people who had natural born children. Also let me explain that both my wife & I are caucasian. We raised our youngest with few questions about her skin tone difference from her - we just always taught her that God loves wondrous variety - I have blue eyes, her mom & she have brown eyes. I am a boy, they are girls... that type of thing... color was never a big deal to us & therefore it was not a big deal to her or her older siblings.... now onto the story...
While in a restraunt with my wife & (at that tme 18 mos old) daughter... an older lady comes up to our table and asks if that was my wife (pointed at DW) - I, not knowing the woman & thinking the DW perhaps did - replied yes. The woman then pointed at my daughter in her carrier & asked if that was my daughter - again thinking it was someone my DW knew - I replied kindly "yes". The woman then said "WELL HOW.......?" Obviously by this time I became pissed off (I AM HUMAN!) So I replied... Oh she (daughter) is from my FIRST marriage! and turned my back to the woman......
The funny part is that many people in the community thought that DD WAS from an unknown first marriage of mine!!!!
The second & worst was last year when a fellow college mate of my wife's came up & asked "Is this your ADOPTED daughter?" in front of DD. Even though she was 10 yo at the time - she had never thought she was adopted - her color difference never crossed her mind as we raised her the way we did. We didn't hide the fact from her but also PEOPLE NEED TO REALIZE she is NOT my ADOPTED daughter - she IS MY DAUGHTER. Everything turned out ok for DD - she waited until I came home and ask me about it (she's a daddy's girl) & she knows I will not lie to her... so I told her... you were not born from my body but in my heart.... you are God's greatest gift to me & I am blessed that God picked you to be my daughter... DD accepted that and has never questioned it again....
IT KILLS ME THAT PEOPLE CAN BE SO CALLOUS as to say such things in front of a child.....
As far as anyone else saying rude things to me personally - I blow it off - I am happy with who I am & you can either join the trainride of my life OR GO AWAY!
Our youngest child is (adopted) bi-racial. First let me say that although all 3 of my kids are not born of our body - they were born in our hearts! We love them as much or possibly more than some people who had natural born children. Also let me explain that both my wife & I are caucasian. We raised our youngest with few questions about her skin tone difference from her - we just always taught her that God loves wondrous variety - I have blue eyes, her mom & she have brown eyes. I am a boy, they are girls... that type of thing... color was never a big deal to us & therefore it was not a big deal to her or her older siblings.... now onto the story...
While in a restraunt with my wife & (at that tme 18 mos old) daughter... an older lady comes up to our table and asks if that was my wife (pointed at DW) - I, not knowing the woman & thinking the DW perhaps did - replied yes. The woman then pointed at my daughter in her carrier & asked if that was my daughter - again thinking it was someone my DW knew - I replied kindly "yes". The woman then said "WELL HOW.......?" Obviously by this time I became pissed off (I AM HUMAN!) So I replied... Oh she (daughter) is from my FIRST marriage! and turned my back to the woman......
The funny part is that many people in the community thought that DD WAS from an unknown first marriage of mine!!!!The second & worst was last year when a fellow college mate of my wife's came up & asked "Is this your ADOPTED daughter?" in front of DD. Even though she was 10 yo at the time - she had never thought she was adopted - her color difference never crossed her mind as we raised her the way we did. We didn't hide the fact from her but also PEOPLE NEED TO REALIZE she is NOT my ADOPTED daughter - she IS MY DAUGHTER. Everything turned out ok for DD - she waited until I came home and ask me about it (she's a daddy's girl) & she knows I will not lie to her... so I told her... you were not born from my body but in my heart.... you are God's greatest gift to me & I am blessed that God picked you to be my daughter... DD accepted that and has never questioned it again....
IT KILLS ME THAT PEOPLE CAN BE SO CALLOUS as to say such things in front of a child.....
As far as anyone else saying rude things to me personally - I blow it off - I am happy with who I am & you can either join the trainride of my life OR GO AWAY!
Quail_Antwerp
Cold is on the Right, Hot is on The Left
I think the rudest thing ever said to me was when we were expecting baby #4.
I was a member at our local Methodist Church, and one of the women there said to me upon hearing of my pregnancy, "I'm so sorry! Well, you know I won't suggest you have an abortion, but what are you going to do?"
I was floored, and hurt.
With baby number 5, someone from the same church worked as a cashier at our local grocery. As she was scanning my items, she kept looking at my stomach then my face, back and forth. I said, "Yes, we're having a baby."
Her reply was, "Why?" in a tone that all but said I was stupid.
It never ceases to amaze me how other people think it's their business, or that they have the right to comment, when people choose to procreate. Unless you were IN the bedroom during conception, it's NONE of your business.
I was a member at our local Methodist Church, and one of the women there said to me upon hearing of my pregnancy, "I'm so sorry! Well, you know I won't suggest you have an abortion, but what are you going to do?"
I was floored, and hurt.
With baby number 5, someone from the same church worked as a cashier at our local grocery. As she was scanning my items, she kept looking at my stomach then my face, back and forth. I said, "Yes, we're having a baby."
Her reply was, "Why?" in a tone that all but said I was stupid.
It never ceases to amaze me how other people think it's their business, or that they have the right to comment, when people choose to procreate. Unless you were IN the bedroom during conception, it's NONE of your business.
me&thegals
A Major Squash & Pumpkin Lover
Haha! Not a stupid question. In fact, I bet her black hair DID get hotter, absorbing all the heat of the sun. We used to have a golden and black lab. The black one was always hotter in summer than the golden.
Okay, enough commenting on all of your instances of rudeness. I can't think of people being rude directly to me, or at least nothing that I can remember.
However, I tend to remember all the rudeness directed at others. I will never forget an unmentionable rudeness between my FIL and husband. I always remember the times when my kids have been treated with impatience or unkindness. And I never forget the many, many racial comments I have heard in certain family gatherings through the years (not my family). It's especially hurtful now with a niece and nephew adopted from South America and my kids making nonwhite friends in school.
People are ignorant and insensitive sometimes, and I'm working really hard on not letting it get to me enough to make me bitter myself. Grrrrrrr.... Not quite there yet.
Okay, enough commenting on all of your instances of rudeness. I can't think of people being rude directly to me, or at least nothing that I can remember.
However, I tend to remember all the rudeness directed at others. I will never forget an unmentionable rudeness between my FIL and husband. I always remember the times when my kids have been treated with impatience or unkindness. And I never forget the many, many racial comments I have heard in certain family gatherings through the years (not my family). It's especially hurtful now with a niece and nephew adopted from South America and my kids making nonwhite friends in school.
People are ignorant and insensitive sometimes, and I'm working really hard on not letting it get to me enough to make me bitter myself. Grrrrrrr.... Not quite there yet.
me&thegals
A Major Squash & Pumpkin Lover
So, so true. Mess with me--I'm an adult and can take it. But mess with my kids or the view of the world I am trying to teach them (tolerance, kindness, love) and watch out!nop169 said:
Good for you and the wonderful gift of love you've given your kids!
I do NOT understand why people make adoption comment in front of the children! What on earth?!? Perhaps the parents have not yet talked about that aspect yet. Perhaps the children have not noticed any differences yet. Duh! What a terrible way to have an adoption story be forced in public.
SKR8PN
Late For Supper
To all you ladies that have been asked that question about your boobies...... I think we need photographic proof of the aforementioned body parts. That way we can decide for our self if they are yours or not.me&thegals said:
me&thegals
A Major Squash & Pumpkin Lover
Uh, Skr8pn, maybe you're trying to qualify for the rudest comment?SKR8PN said:To all you ladies that have been asked that question about your boobies...... I think we need photographic proof of the aforementioned body parts. That way we can decide for our self if they are yours or not.me&thegals said:
By the way, you attributed the quote wrongly to me. I have most definitely never been asked that question.- Thread starter
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