Bee~ Journal of then...

[shareneh]

Sorry to hear about the roll over Bee.

You know what? I think you will get all those things that you want. I think that they will be provided and none of your plans will have to wait. I really think you don't have to worry about that stuff happening because you deserve to get it.

Ask and it shall be given.

Take care Bee

Sharene

 

[freemotion]

Yep!! I see you got your avatar running, ET!!!

Yup, that's me, peeking through a log in Florida last Feb at Hammock Park. DH tends to take most pictures of my from the rear view, this was a rare view....

 

[Beekissed]

Wow! Thanks, Shareneh! I sure hope God feels the same way! I've been asking and I haven't forgotten to ask that it be His will and not mine be done. I will admit to expressing some bitterness to God over this little surprise, especially today. But then, God and I are old friends and He knows that I'm not perfect by a long shot, so I'm sure He is patient with His children when they cry out. I've cried out alot, you see.....

To know why, you would have to know some history of my life. Let's just say that I've lived a very unfortunate existence and, with every event folks would tell me that God may be testing me or developing me, or some such thing. I am here to tell you today, that God has tested me more than anyone I've ever known in my immediate circle! If He doesn't know what I'm made of by now or hasn't shaped me by turmoil yet....well, it just ain't gonna happen!

That doesn't mean I don't pray every day for God to show me what He wants for my life and to thank Him for every little and big happiness. I've at least learned that much over the years!!!

I really like being able to discuss this with all you good people, as my church folks aren't real big into fellowship at all. Especially with me....the only single woman in church. Add to that I'm somewhat a weird gal who likes to be SS and that keeps most of the women from talking to me at all!

 

[freemotion]

I really like being able to discuss this with all you good people, as my church folks aren't real big into fellowship at all. Especially with me....the only single woman in church. Add to that I'm somewhat a weird gal who likes to be SS and that keeps most of the women from talking to me at all!

WELL!!! They certainly have a LONG ways to go in their spiritual journey!

ETA: And THEIR LOSS, TOO!!! So there!

 

[Beekissed]

Yeah....and they hardly ever smile....sad, huh? I think that is one of the reasons why folks don't pal around with me because I smile and laugh alot. They always are looking at me like they can't figure me out and this upsets them. It happens at work too.

I've had people come right out and ask me how I stay so happy, what with my struggling along with one income and all. When I tell them they look at me like I'm lying and say that they wouldn't be as happy as I am for those reasons! I think they think I'm hiding something....like I know a secret and won't tell. Go figure!

 

[freemotion]

Sheeeesh! Remember the bell curve? It covers more than the grades on that math test....

 

[Beekissed]

Yes! I wish happiness was contagious, like a cold, and everyone would get a good 2 wks of it at least once a year!

 

[shareneh]

Yeah, I used to attend church three times a week. Wednesday nights and twice on Sunday. I guess that's where they get the saying "once a week and twice on Sunday". I really got into the church, I was a sunday school teacher, church secretary, van driver, cook and all around worker.

Me and my kids attended everything we could. I gave my tithes and more. I loved my preacher and his wife like they were my parents. I lived and breathed the bible. I couldn't wait to tell everyone about my relationship with God. It was a great time, I learned so much.

I got kicked out of sunday school teaching because I took my kids to a community dance after the all day celebrations for a town centenial. sic I was hurt but kept trying to get back in their good graces.

Every summer they would have a group come to our reservation and have vacation bible camp. I would use my two weeks of vacation for that time. The ladies and girls who came to help were very snooty. They didn't talk to me or even look at me without being forced. I am not an ugly person so I knew it was because they judged me. I was single and friendly. I talked to everyone and tried to be friends. To their credit, I made some friends within those groups but not many. If I talked to a man about anything he would always say "I'm married or ask your preacher". I was too stupid to realize they thought I was after them in some other way. Little did they know they weren't even my type!

After a while the preacher and his wife were having me and my family do all the work outside of giving the sermon. We handled 50-70 kids every sunday. We cooked the kids a hot meal and made sure they had fun at church. We put on I love Jesus parties on halloween and easter egg hunts on Easter. We did what we could.

The last three years I atteded church the pastor's wife became withdrawn from all things church. She said she wasn't sure she was saved and her husband just ignored her after that. She didn't want to bother with a Christmas program for the kids and their parents. I felt pity for her and tried to cheer her up by cleaning her house and doing her errands when I could. Nothing helped.

The last Christmas we spent at that church my mother decided that we would put on a program and meal for Christmas regardless of what the preachers wife said. We didn't ask permission and the preacher and his wife were mad to say the least. They didn't say anything until the program and meal were over then they kicked us out of church for good.

I don't put stock in people anymore. Just the Lord. I have dedicated my life and my children's lives to Him and that is all I really need to do to be content.

What I am saying is... Don't worry about those ladies or anyone else. Do what you know God would love for you to do and you have no worries anymore. God is your guide and as long as you two are square you are good to go. I just love having you people as my new friends by the way

 

[Farmfresh]

Yes! I wish happiness was contagious, like a cold, and everyone would get a good 2 wks of it at least once a year!

Good News Bee - happiness IS contagious! I recently read a scientific study (found it on Yahoo) that one happy person can increase the happiness of people they are around by like 50% AND that happiness has a trickle down effect to friends of friends of friends!

Why can't WE get government money for a study like that?

shareneh: Just because you got burned at one church do not give up on the benefits of fellowship in a church setting. These days many churches struggle with sin. It is hard in these times to get a group of people to actually focus on the job at hand and worship the LORD. I have many friends who feel just as you do now.

Please keep trying out new churches until you find a church that fits you and your (God given) gifts. We are not all like the church you left and we need fellow laborers that will help lead others to Christ.

 

[Farmfresh]

Also Bee - I think the rental idea is GREAT. It really takes the pressure off.

Also your discovery of the "death trap" is probably an additional blessing. You would have had a lot more problems if your son had been injured by driving this car. Those kids will drive cars in awful shape simply due to inexperience.

More blessings are coming!