Quail_Antwerp: Words from the Barnyard...

[Farmfresh]

I really do like Muscovies. Wish I had room for some. They would be so much fun to watch. When I was at my sissy's saturday I got a kick out of watching her platoon tufted ducks. They were dabbling at everything and actually tried to swim across the puddle left by a tire track!

 

[Quail_Antwerp]

Today was Monday. I'd love to come on here and say it was also Auction day and we had a great time - but this has been the most devestating and longest monday in the history of monday's.

i've debated about even posting what's going on or not. i don't want criticized - i don't want to feel worse than i already do. i blame myself for what has happened althought CPS and the police are all telling us it's not our fault.

this morning at 7:15 am our daughter told us that our nephew molested her last spring several times in the weeks after Ernie's sister left but before Ernie had his surgery. she hadn't told us until now because he said he's shoot her in the head if she told.

I cannot explain the explosion of emotions i felt in that moment. i did the first thing i could think of - and that was call the sheriff's department and file a report. by 8:30 am i was on the phone with the county CPS supervisor bawling uncontrollably. i made sure i was in another room so that my dd couldn't hear or see that i was that upset. somehow i've managed to keep my emotions under control around her.

The day was spent filing reports, taking steps to get protective orders, and DD being interviewed by CPS so that they can make an arrest stick.

We did go to the auction today - the cps super suggested we try to make the day as normal as any other monday would be. I replied that nothing felt normal about today. but we took them, and dropped off 4 bunnies and 1 rooster. and then left minutes later and took the kids to Wendy's for lunch.

Took DD in for her interview in the afternoon, and after they spoke with her they brought us back to talk to us.

Ernie telling them if they didn't get justice for our daughter, he'd make sure justice was served.

me belating the fact that we sold the pigs - wishing I could turn him into hog meal.

more crying.

we're so angry and hurt and just don't know what to feel right now. DD seemed to be relieved to have told finally, we told her she was brave she did a good thing to tell, and that we love her.

but we've been sick to our stomachs and nervous wrecks all day.

and when all is said and done, i feel i'm to blame for allowing them into our home. i tried to help them when they cried and whined that they had no place to go. this price for helping was too high - and i'll never help any of my husband's family again.

they're hoping for an arrest by the end of the week - but he has to be expedited back to Ohio since it happened here.

We're hoping they'll tie him to a wall in his cell and give us (dh and me) an hour alone with him.

may not even need an hour.

 

[dacjohns]

No criticizing from me. You've taken the first step towards healing.

 

[FarmerDenise]

I my!!! This was always one of my worst nightmares as a mother. How old is this nephew?
It is a really good thing that your DD finally told you. Get therapy for everyone, as soon as possible. That way you will learn how to deal with this. Your DD can heal from this. I did. I'll pm you.

I know it is hard, but don't blame yourself. You know, that if you had the remotest inkling that this was going on, you would have stopped it!!!! Just keep remembering that! I know you would not have allowed this to happen. So please, try not to blame yourself.

 

[Quail_Antwerp]

but we did get suspicious of him - with his own daughter. once we became suspicious we made sure our kids were never left alone with him. We started to get suspicious just before ernie's surgery, but weren't sure, and we had no evidience and his daughter was only 3 so she couldn't exactly tell.

our nephew is 24.

but

we learned there was a previous case against him that couldn't be finished. the maternal grandmother to his DD was trying to get him on statutory because her DD was 14 and he was 20 when he got her pregnant. the DD refused to press charges so they were trying to get him on endangerment of a minor.

but.

Ernie's brother - the BIL from HELL - found out the 14 yo was preggers and made the **** head nephew sign up and leave for boot camp (army) to "save his ass" as they put it.

 

[big brown horse]

Q_A, I'm so sorry!!

 

[FarmerDenise]

Aly, here is link to an Organization that is really helpful. I got a lot of help from them.
http://www.parentsunited.info/findlay/benefit.html

 

[Dace]

Oh honey it is not your fault!

We are your friends and we are here to support you

I am so proud of your DD for being so brave and telling you, poor thing, she must be relieved.

Be brave for her and get that SOB locked up!

 

[Henrietta23]

I am so very sorry that this is happening to you! No judgment or criticism. I can't even imagine what you are going through.

 

[ksalvagno]

I am so sorry to hear about this. I hope that jerk gets locked up and the key thrown away. I sure hope your DD will be ok.