Bee~ Journal of then...

[Quail_Antwerp]

I just don't have the level of fear that most folks do, I guess.

I think that's great!

I wish I could say the same for the area we live in. Three pediphiles live right down the road from us, a Father and Two brothers! All from the same family!

Few years ago (like 10) we lost 6 head of cow to someone poisoning them. We didn't have a dog then.

Then we've had people come and steal gas out of our cars.

And we live in a pretty rural area!!

The last couple years things haven't been as bad, though.

 

[Beekissed]

Probably because of your man-eating dog! God's way of giving you a fear-free existence where you live?

My mother ordered mace since she is living alone now. She carries it strapped to her arm and a bigger one for the house and one on her key ring. I think this is wise for a woman living alone who is unwise about the ways of the world. She has lived a pretty sheltered life and lacks the rough confidence that I have, so I think it's the best step for her.

I don't think anyone, upon meeting me, would view me as an easy mark. But Mom? She has led a lifetime of pure submission to the opposite sex and I think folks can sense that in her. Dangerous, especially when one is as small and old as she.

I think living here will slowly give her the confidence she needs. I coach her all the time and hope she puts things into practice. She will be traveling by herself this next month, so it's very important for her to learn how to avoid potential predators in this life.

The mace was a good first step but the attitude of fear must be trained out of her. She needs to walk confidently and not scurry to the truck. She needs to meet men's gaze with confidence while in public and not lower her eyes...as she has been trained to do over all these years by my father. He would never let her look at men, not even just with casual gaze.

I hope to be able to change her safety zone, not by protecting her, but by teaching her realistic fears vs. unrealistic fears. What to look for, how to react, how to walk, talk and move less like a victim in this world.

And, lastly? To have faith that God is there, moving right along side you every step of the way. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for thou art with me.....

 

[Blackbird]

I guess some people just aren't ready to die. If I had a choice of accepting to die, or say, some Mace and a chance to live, I'd take the Mace. I'm not ready to go, I know that much. But if I do go - oh well! LOL. I'd rather not, quite yet though. There are reasons why there is Mace nd such, but you are right, if someone does die, it was probably meant to be, no matter the circumstance, even if it probably shouldn't have happened in our terms and minds.

Does that make sense. lol.

 

[freemotion]

Give her time. A great book is "The Gift of Fear" by...oh, what is his name....Gavin DeBecker, I think. An older book but very empowering. It helped me a lot with fear.

I do own mace, and got a fresh canister this year. Had a bit of a stalker....it took me some time, but I learned to stand tall and stare him down in the courtroom and courthouse halls. Interesting how he leaves me alone now....hmmm....nothing else works. My own demeanor was the key in this situation.

I don't carry the mace always....about the only time now is if I go swimming with my dog, who knows who will be at the spots at the lake where I can take him. A can of mace rubber-banded to my wrist helps me walk tall.

A cousin who is a detective and swat team member helps, too....

I am more inclined to carry it for a few weeks when walking my dog after there has been a bear sighting or if I see tracks of bear or too many coyotes!

 

[Beekissed]

My own demeanor was the key in this situation.

That's my mom's problem, free. That whole demeanor of walking small all the time. She is really more confident than most would be in her situation but she still is such a babe in the woods about the outside world!

BB, I understood every word! I'll give you a little advice, though, however unsolicited....just because it took me soooo long to learn it! Until you are ready to die, you can never truly live.

I didn't really know that for many years and then I realized that we will all die. No matter what. Sooner or late, tragically or peacefully, we will all die. After I got that through my head, I could plan around that particular fact. At least that is one sure thing that we can count on!

Now I can plan around it, pack in a lot of living in each day because I know it may be my last here on Earth, treat people more kindly, love people more strongly, fear less, laugh more, see more beauty in a sunset and cherish every good thing because I know. I know that I will die on this earth.

The best part is knowing that it isn't the end for me and that I get to start a new life in the best of worlds. If I didn't know that, then the thought of dying just might make me a little depressed or morose. I might fear the inevitable a little more....but I don't have to. I tell ya, there is nothing like having that knowing and the peace that comes with it!

The security provided by a can of mace just doesn't measure up to it.....

 

[Blackbird]

Awwww, I understand where your coming from, thats kind of sweet, in an almost bitter tragic kind of way. I'm happy for you!

 

[Beekissed]

Brat!

 

[Blackbird]

Hey! I was serious. It was very heartfelt.

 

[Beekissed]

I could tell by the sincere look on your face as you were rolling on the floor, laughing.....

Laugh all you want, whippersnapper! One day you'll remember this old lady's advice and a light will dawn.....slowly...but it will dawn!

 

[Farmfresh]

My D2 used to carry a big can of mace with her everywhere in her purse. She is small and pretty much looks like one of those "Brat Dolls" that they sell to our poor unsuspecting children. (By the way she IS a brat too ... but that is another whole thread). D1 also very pretty... blond, tall, thin and MUCH more confident ... carries a BIG a__ knife (and would probably gut an assailant!)

Anyway ... D1 was driving, Geek son is in the front seat riding shotgun and D2 is digging through her purse in the back seat and ends up macing the whole lot of them! Sometimes you have got to be smarter than the aerosol can!