big brown horse
Hoof In Mouth
Bingo on the exercise bit! I havn't felt better in, well since the last time exercise took priority.
Mental health is important too! Stories, advice?
- Thread starter Beekissed
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me&thegals
A Major Squash & Pumpkin Lover
So maybe the trick is to surround ourselves with people we KNOW love and accept us. When I think someone doesn't like me, I really try to take a close look at myself to see if it's somethat that really SHOULD be changed. If I can't see something like that, I try to accept that not everyone on this earth is going to adore everyone else on this earth and just let it go.
me&thegals
A Major Squash & Pumpkin Lover
It's almost miraculous, isn't it? I've heard and read that exercise is just as effective as an antidepressant in treating depression, only with wonderful side effects!big brown horse said:
big brown horse
Hoof In Mouth
Right ON! Exercise and laughter two of my favorite things at the moment. Oh, and chocolate! (The good for you kindme&thegals said:
)
FarmerChick
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Also for me, one of the best things I can do for myself is "give myself a break" and "to treat myself"
And I do both and it does help if I get into a sad mood.
I have been doing both of those more and more and yes, it feels good!
And I do both and it does help if I get into a sad mood.
I have been doing both of those more and more and yes, it feels good!
me&thegals
A Major Squash & Pumpkin Lover
How true, Farmerchick! Maybe instead of snapping and canning those 35 lb of beans (yes, I found 2 more lb in the garden!!), I will curl up in the hammock with a good book. Or....maybe I'll work on the beans with a nice hot cup of tea and listen to a book on CD.
I so agree--taking care of ourselves is so important in feeling emotionally well. I also thinking that caring for others is so important. This thread just reminded me. Sometimes when I feel really down, the best way to feel better again is do something really great for somebody else. It ends up helping me even more than it helps them!
I so agree--taking care of ourselves is so important in feeling emotionally well. I also thinking that caring for others is so important. This thread just reminded me. Sometimes when I feel really down, the best way to feel better again is do something really great for somebody else. It ends up helping me even more than it helps them!
FarmerChick
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great point. helping someone else puts a smile on their face and in return we smile......!!me&thegals said:
2dream
Flibbertigibbet
Do you guys try to let it all go or do you hold it to you and nurse it along? I let it go. I will think about it and decide if they are right or wrong in whatever they said or did. If I decide they are right then it is something I need to recognize about myself and change, apologize for or let them know that I think they are right. If they are wrong they can go take a hike. Family or friend makes no difference.
Do you have old hurts and griefs that you dwell on or do you try to resolve them in your hearts and minds? No one but my children and DH have the power to hurt me deeply. All others are just surface scrapes that heal quickly. DH and Children are always forgiven and all is forgotten. (Forgetting is easy for me)
Do you jump defensively when people have dissenting views or seem to criticize you or do you lash back, think about it for days and keep re-living it in your minds? I actually love it when people have opposing views. I love good debates. Criticisims roll off my back like water on a duck. Constructive criticisims will get my attention. I seldom get defensive. Why should I? People do not have to agree with me anymore than I have to agree with them. Even accusations don't bother me if I did not do it. I usually simply state that they are wrong. If they insist I just say "believe what you will, I know the truth". Really, what else is there to say.
My DH laughs at me because I do have a tendency to become totally indignant at real or imagined hurts sometimes. He says I am like a dud firecracker. I make all this bright flair for 2 seconds when the fuse is lite and then never explode. Just fizzle out - and then off to more fun and humerous things. 10 minutes later you can ask me what I was so upset about and I won't have a clue.
It all happens so fast that if you did not know me you would never know I was upset.
I am also really slow to make angry. I figure most folks are busy and self absorbed. They are not out to get me or hurt me. They just did not realize how they came across. It takes a few times before I will express myself about their rudness and insensitivity, and the first time is usually with some type of humerous quip.
I do have an amazing ability to get over things and totally forget them. Ummm maybe thats not an ability but an illness because I don't remember what I ate for lunch yesterday either.
As far as road rage and parking lots well, some folks just can't help it. If they think I am driving to slow now wait until they start tailgateing me. I figure they should have just left earlier.
Parking lot people also hate me. Because as easy going as I am in most situations - I can, have and will push back. My friends did not give me the name "Runs With Scissors, Don't Play Well With Others" for no reason.
Do you have old hurts and griefs that you dwell on or do you try to resolve them in your hearts and minds? No one but my children and DH have the power to hurt me deeply. All others are just surface scrapes that heal quickly. DH and Children are always forgiven and all is forgotten. (Forgetting is easy for me)
Do you jump defensively when people have dissenting views or seem to criticize you or do you lash back, think about it for days and keep re-living it in your minds? I actually love it when people have opposing views. I love good debates. Criticisims roll off my back like water on a duck. Constructive criticisims will get my attention. I seldom get defensive. Why should I? People do not have to agree with me anymore than I have to agree with them. Even accusations don't bother me if I did not do it. I usually simply state that they are wrong. If they insist I just say "believe what you will, I know the truth". Really, what else is there to say.
My DH laughs at me because I do have a tendency to become totally indignant at real or imagined hurts sometimes. He says I am like a dud firecracker. I make all this bright flair for 2 seconds when the fuse is lite and then never explode. Just fizzle out - and then off to more fun and humerous things. 10 minutes later you can ask me what I was so upset about and I won't have a clue.
It all happens so fast that if you did not know me you would never know I was upset.
I am also really slow to make angry. I figure most folks are busy and self absorbed. They are not out to get me or hurt me. They just did not realize how they came across. It takes a few times before I will express myself about their rudness and insensitivity, and the first time is usually with some type of humerous quip.
I do have an amazing ability to get over things and totally forget them. Ummm maybe thats not an ability but an illness because I don't remember what I ate for lunch yesterday either.
As far as road rage and parking lots well, some folks just can't help it. If they think I am driving to slow now wait until they start tailgateing me. I figure they should have just left earlier.
Parking lot people also hate me. Because as easy going as I am in most situations - I can, have and will push back. My friends did not give me the name "Runs With Scissors, Don't Play Well With Others" for no reason.
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Beekissed
Mountain Sage
I'll tell you what else I try to avoid.....people who never tell you if you have hurt them in some mysterious way. They just get mad and never talk to you again or say little mean things to try to hurt you.
My whole family is pretty much like that, except for me and one of my sister's. They've all been mad at each other for many, many years but no one can remember why, no one will tell someone when they've gotten their feelings hurt over something, so no one can ever say they are sorry.....heck, they don't even know what they should be sorry FOR!
"Passive aggressiveness" is the term for this. It destroys so many families, friendships, marriages....you name it, its destructive.
A person can make themselves crazy trying to guess what you said wrong this time? or why in the world they aren't speaking to me now?
For heaven's sake, if someone is stepping on your toes you need to say it! Folks aren't mind readers and they cannot learn what sets you off unless you tell them.
In my family, my older sister and I are the only ones who will discuss our feelings openly. We've found that its way too much work fretting over all that drama.
Just say what you mean, apologize when you should, try to be kind and considerate and let it go in one ear and out the other if its not really important.
She and I have concluded we are way too lazy to nurture a grudge or to flare up over imagined hurts.....takes too much work to think about it all the time!
My whole family is pretty much like that, except for me and one of my sister's. They've all been mad at each other for many, many years but no one can remember why, no one will tell someone when they've gotten their feelings hurt over something, so no one can ever say they are sorry.....heck, they don't even know what they should be sorry FOR!
"Passive aggressiveness" is the term for this. It destroys so many families, friendships, marriages....you name it, its destructive.
A person can make themselves crazy trying to guess what you said wrong this time? or why in the world they aren't speaking to me now?
For heaven's sake, if someone is stepping on your toes you need to say it! Folks aren't mind readers and they cannot learn what sets you off unless you tell them.
In my family, my older sister and I are the only ones who will discuss our feelings openly. We've found that its way too much work fretting over all that drama.
Just say what you mean, apologize when you should, try to be kind and considerate and let it go in one ear and out the other if its not really important.
She and I have concluded we are way too lazy to nurture a grudge or to flare up over imagined hurts.....takes too much work to think about it all the time!
FarmerChick
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Bee said----I'll tell you what else I try to avoid.....people who never tell you if you have hurt them in some mysterious way. They just get mad and never talk to you again or say little mean things to try to hurt you.
Yea Bee and to these people I say who cares! If they do that, they were never really a friend or just miserable people in my book. And if they avoid me or try to verbally hurt me, they are written out of my life. Who wants to stand for that game in life...not worth it!!!Who has the time, not me..HA HA
Yea Bee and to these people I say who cares! If they do that, they were never really a friend or just miserable people in my book. And if they avoid me or try to verbally hurt me, they are written out of my life. Who wants to stand for that game in life...not worth it!!!Who has the time, not me..HA HA
