Mental health is important too! Stories, advice?

[Beekissed]

Me too! I just quietly avoid them and write them off as never-to-be mature adults. I don't have time to be dancing around trying to unruffle feathers that were born to be ruffled.

 

[SKR8PN]

I am going to set this up just you guys know a little background. Back in 1989, I won an award. Top Chrysler Technician in the United States. I worked my keister off to earn that award, and you know what the dealership that I was working for at the time, did in appreciation of all that hard work? Nothing, Nadda, Zip. No congrats, no pay raise, no recognition at all. Wouldn't advertise the fact that the top FOUR Chrysler technicians IN THE ENTIRE COUNTRY were working for them at the time!! I am here to tell ya,we had a kick arse service department!!! At least Chrysler Corporation gave me my choice of ANY car that I wanted, to use for a year free!!
ANYWHO......I was approached with a job offer from another dealership. I had heard the rumors about how nasty they could be to work for, but I was soooo close to being far enough out of debt, that I could open my own shop. The money they offered was obscene for an auto tech at the time, so I took the job offer. I only worked there for 18 months when I had finally had enough. It was so bad that I had to drink a pot of coffee every morning and try to talk myself into going to work that day. AND, after I got there, the first thing I had to do was take two Tylenol, because I KNEW I was going to get a headache. Worst job I ever had and to this day it was the LAST job I ever had! That little episode taught me that money ain't everything.
Next big thing was my heart attack. THAT my friends was a huge wake up call. It was brought on by stress, plain and simple. I was building a car project that went way, WAAAAY over budget due to me being to damn nice to a "friend". We are talkin' 50 grand in labor charges I let him screw me so bad it wasn't even funny. I lost my father near the beginning of the project, then, near the end, my mother had a very bad stroke. That was 3 weeks before my heart attack. Everything seemed to pile up and I let it get to me in a big way. No more. I wake up everyday in a good mood, and every single time someone asks me how I am, my standard response is "I am simply incredible. To be any better, I'd have to be twins, and the world ain't ready for THAT!"


My poor wife has to work with an office full of back-stabbing, lying and NASTY women. If I had her job, I'd have to postal on their arses!!

 

[Thewife]

I have lived my entire life with people who like to scream and yell, complain about every body else around them, find fault where ever they can, gossip, lie, cut, condemm and spend hours whining how unfair and rough their lives are!
I used to just shut up and let them use me as their whipping post!
But then, my sister called me to ask a question, I was asleep, I barely remember the call! I do remember I thought we were done talking, maybe I hung up on her, maybe her phone dropped the call, I really don't know!
Because of this call. I have recieved 6 or 7 letters in the past week, cutting and condemning me for everything I have ever said and done in my life! Telling me how I should feel sorry for her and my other sister because they have bum husbands and they are so broke?(can't tell by the new car, trip to holland or all the jewelry) I didn't tell her how deep in debt I am, I am an adult, it's my problem? I feel my marraige is between me, my husband and god! Just because I don't spend hours cutting him to pieces does not mean we don't have our own problems.
One of her many questions was why I never call or go see them.
I go to thinking about it, and I realized, I am happy when I don't have to deal with their poor me pity party carp! If they want to hate me and avoid me, I think that is a good thing! That may sound selfish, but I just can't take it anymore!

So I decided, if some one can't accept me for who I am, that is their problem!
I refuse to put on a mask just to pacify others, life is too short!
If people want to spend every waking moment pondering the down sides of life, then that is all they are going to see! There ain't nothing I can do to help them!
If they want to spread lies rumors or gossip about me, whatever! I will just stay as far away from them as possible!
I try to be thankful for the good things in life and pray I make it through the bad!

Hubby brought home a nice bonus check the other day, it won't get us out of debt, but it was a much needed blessing! I think it is sad that I could not even tell my own family about my good news, knowing they would have reacted with jelousy and dumped all their money problems on me with the same derogitory tones I have heard my whole life!

Life is too short to spend it being miserable!

 

[Henrietta23]

I have found working in several different schools over the years that I am better off NOT eating in the staff room. It tends to be a huge vent session about anything and everything and I would rarely leave feeling good.
I've had a few people in my life that I thought were friends. I was always there for them when they needed me and some of them seemed to need me a lot. With certain ones I became aware of how draining it was, always being their cheerleader. It was usually a situation where they needed to make some changes (leave the cheating husband, stop drinking, etc.) I could listen, answer questions, give opinions if asked, etc. But nothing ever seemed to change. I find myself putting distance between those people and myself. I have one woman I used to be friends with who is currently emailing my husband asking for my new email address. He is kind of dancing around the question. We haven't spoken in a few years, no major falling out, I just had to tell her I couldn't handle the drunken rambling conversations when she called late at night. I feel a twinge of guilt but I found I got nothing out of this friendship. It was exhausting. It probably sounds pretty cruel. I think I just don't like to be needed or something, except by my own family.

 

[Quail_Antwerp]

I decided to MOVE!

 

[keljonma]

I have found working in several different schools over the years that I am better off NOT eating in the staff room. It tends to be a huge vent session about anything and everything and I would rarely leave feeling good.

A while back dh ran into a similar situation at work. The staff is so divided that dh calls them the Jets and the Sharks (West Side Story, anyone?). After 2 weeks, dh couldn't take the tension. So he decided to start reading his Bible during his lunch break.

No one talks bad about anyone or anything around him any more, and he is enjoying his lunch breaks once again.

 

[Beekissed]

8. Life is too short to spend it being miserable!

Yes!


Aly! GREAT news! I think you will find a weight has lifted off your shoulders with that decision.

I love all these stories of how everyone has managed to cope with the kinds of things and people who try to make us feel bad.

It sure does let me know that my life and all the bad things and people that happened to me have happened to other people.....its not just me or the area or even the type of job.

Its sort of universal....those who want to give misery, those of us who take it and those of us who no longer take it. Its both heartening~ and disheartening~ to know that its that widespread.

No one talks bad about anyone or anything around him any more, and he is enjoying his lunch breaks once again.

Keljonma, I think that is just the best story....and so very funny! Wish I had thought of that years ago..... :/

 

[keljonma]

Yeah, Bee! God's Word brings the peace that passes understanding.

 

[Beekissed]

Yeah, Bee! God's Word brings the peace that passes understanding.

In more ways than one!

You know what.....it really does. I was just telling my son this very thing. When something happens at work that really makes you mad and you can't get it out of your mind when you get home....when it replays over and over and you just feel sick in the pit of your stomach....

Just pray that God removes that feeling from your heart and from your mind. This always works for me! I wish I had been smart enough to appeal to the Good Lord way back when.....

 

[FarmerChick]

I am going to set this up just you guys know a little background. Back in 1989, I won an award. Top Chrysler Technician in the United States. I worked my keister off to earn that award, and you know what the dealership that I was working for at the time, did in appreciation of all that hard work? Nothing, Nadda, Zip. No congrats, no pay raise, no recognition at all. Wouldn't advertise the fact that the top FOUR Chrysler technicians IN THE ENTIRE COUNTRY were working for them at the time!! I am here to tell ya,we had a kick arse service department!!! At least Chrysler Corporation gave me my choice of ANY car that I wanted, to use for a year free!!
ANYWHO......I was approached with a job offer from another dealership. I had heard the rumors about how nasty they could be to work for, but I was soooo close to being far enough out of debt, that I could open my own shop. The money they offered was obscene for an auto tech at the time, so I took the job offer. I only worked there for 18 months when I had finally had enough. It was so bad that I had to drink a pot of coffee every morning and try to talk myself into going to work that day. AND, after I got there, the first thing I had to do was take two Tylenol, because I KNEW I was going to get a headache. Worst job I ever had and to this day it was the LAST job I ever had! That little episode taught me that money ain't everything.
Next big thing was my heart attack. THAT my friends was a huge wake up call. It was brought on by stress, plain and simple. I was building a car project that went way, WAAAAY over budget due to me being to damn nice to a "friend". We are talkin' 50 grand in labor charges I let him screw me so bad it wasn't even funny. I lost my father near the beginning of the project, then, near the end, my mother had a very bad stroke. That was 3 weeks before my heart attack. Everything seemed to pile up and I let it get to me in a big way. No more. I wake up everyday in a good mood, and every single time someone asks me how I am, my standard response is "I am simply incredible. To be any better, I'd have to be twins, and the world ain't ready for THAT!"


My poor wife has to work with an office full of back-stabbing, lying and NASTY women. If I had her job, I'd have to postal on their arses!!

I enjoyed your post. It it unreal what we as people will put up with until "we see the light"---I am so glad you are "simply incredible" each day now! Great for you!!!! Life lessons can be hard, but as long as we sure learn from them...then we did OK!

Yea I worked with offices full of women. Some were fab!! others can drive a person insane literally!!

I hope your wife might be looking for another job???? I would be..LOL